Relationships | Girls Chase

Relationships

The continuing and ongoing encounters and involvement you maintain with a woman once you've slept together and become intimate -- whether weeks or months or years -- or more.

How to Get Girls You're Sleeping with to Want You as a Boyfriend

Chase Amante's picture
how to get a girl to want you as a boyfriendSometimes girls sleep with guys they don’t want to date. Here’s how to get a girl to want you as a boyfriend even if she doesn’t think she does (at first).

Most guys struggle to get together with the girls they really want.

Girls slow game them, won’t put out, or turn flakey or start ghosting. They evade the guy’s attempts to take things intimate, and may never go to bed with him.

However, for these guys struggling to bed girls, there’s generally one upside: the girls they do bed tend to be “theirs to lose” when it comes to a relationship. Once she goes to bed with them, she sticks around, tries to make it work, and does her best to push for something serious.

But there’s another class of men where things are the complete opposite.

For these men, getting women into bed is no issue; keeping them around, however, surely is.

Girls might stick around for a bit in short-term relationships. Yet they never stay for something serious.

How do you get girls you’re sleeping with to want you as a boyfriend if you’re this type of guy?

Well, there’re two different reasons this happens to men – once you identify which of the two is causing girls to not want you as a boyfriend, you’ll be well on your way to changing their minds about you.

Why Don't Women Cheat on Men Constantly?

Chase Amante's picture
woman considering cheating with menWomen like sex, and sex is freely available to women. So, why aren’t women indulging in it constantly, cheating on guys right, left, and center?

I have seen this question posed several times in the comment section over the past year:

With sex with men so readily available to women, why don’t women cheat on men constantly?

The question seems to be, “What is holding them back?”

After all, sex feels good!

It takes a while for women to really get in the swing of things. Most girls like sex when they first start having it, but haven’t learned to really have the time of their lives with it yet.

As women age, their reservations about sex drop, they get more in touch with their bodies, and they have a lover or two who trains them how to really enjoy having sex, they begin to really love it. For some girls this happens sooner than others – you’ll meet some girls who are total sex addicts in their teenage years, and others who at 30 are only just starting to understand their bodies.

But, generally speaking, by the time a girl’s around her mid-to-late 20s, assuming she hasn’t led a totally sheltered life (or an extremely strict serially monogamous one where her only two boyfriends weren’t especially remarkable in bed), she’s really learned to love having sex.

Even if she’s younger than that though, she still LIKES sex a whole lot (and MIGHT love it!) and it still feels good… not to mention that sex is extremely validating (“Wow, I CAN get this guy!”).

So why aren’t girls just out there all the time, getting run through by a new guy every night?

The Dap Trap: When Girls Press & Guys "Dawdle, About-Face, Pursue"

Chase Amante's picture
dawedle, about-face, pursueA girl wants to date or maybe for you to commit. But you dawdle and don’t make it happen. So she gives up – but then, you give chase! Why? The Dap Trap!

There’s a flip-floppy male behavior you’ll see in dating that is so predictable it borders on the comical: something I’ve dubbed ‘dap’, for “dawdle, about-face, pursue.”

Lovers vs. Providers: Differences When She's Fertile

Chase Amante's picture
lovers vs. providers in an LTRLovers have it better when it comes to getting together with them fast. But what about in long-term relationships? In fact, lovers have some major advantages here as well.

Let us continue our exploration of the lover’s advantages over the provider in the mating game.

We’ll switch our focus today… from yesterday’s focus on picking women up to today’s: maintaining healthy long-term relationships with them.

I had a conversation the other day with a friend.

We talked about how he believed things had changed with women over the past 10 years. He believed women had become so overstimulated as to make long-term relationships unviable.

I said that wasn’t what I’d seen at all. If anything, women are having less sex now, with fewer partners… and men in general have degraded in their social skills and romantic prowess.

It was a bigger challenge trying to hold onto a woman 10 years ago than it is today.

My friend rose the point of, “What about when she’s fertile?”

There is, after all, well known research showing that fertile women seek out men other than those they’re mated to to mate with. That still is a risk… right?

But in fact, this is a major lovers vs. providers difference… and it’s one that might be surprising to any guy who hasn’t had long-term relationships as “the lover.”

NEW VIDEOS: Why Girls Lie & How to Stop Them Lying

Chase Amante's picture

Lying is one of those things people get really irate about at times.

Everybody does. Guys do when girls do it. Girls get really upset about guys doing it to them, too.

This is just a human thing… telling lies… yet SOME people do it a lot more than OTHERS.

How do you know if the girl you’re talking to is as honest as they come… or if she’s a conniving little scamp?

Furthermore, why DO girls lie – and is there anything you can do to dissuade them from it?

9 Reasons to NOT Take Back Your Ex-Girlfriend

Chase Amante's picture
don't take back your ex-girlfriendShe broke your heart before. But now she wants to get back. Should you do it? Here are 9 reasons why you should NOT get back together with an ex-girlfriend.

I’ve authored several immensely popular articles on how to get a girl back and how to get your girlfriend back. Both of these articles have been read millions of times apiece.

Nevertheless, I have consistently made my opinion on the topic clear over the years: do not take your ex-girlfriend back. Just don’t do it.

People being what they are, of course, there’ve probably been many more men desperately putting the strategies I share in those articles to use than there are considering the reasons to NOT use them. What can I say… people hate that feeling of “losing stuff.” Ex-girlfriends included.

Commenting on my article about easing your own guilty conscience after you break a girl’s heart, reader yseult asks about what reasons there are to not take an ex-girlfriend back:

Chase,

Could you write an article on the reasons not to get back with an ex-girlfriend?

I know you've written a lot on the subject already, usually emphasizing that there's always a better girl out there, so there's no need to get back the ex.

But could you explore the bad things that happen when you get back with an ex, other than limiting yourself from more beautiful women?

Like, if you get back together, is it as magical as it was?

How about if she's been with other men in between, does it affect how she perceives you? Does she submit as she used to?

I'm asking from a perspetive of a guy who's wonderful girlfriend broke up with him on the grounds that her mom will never accept a brown guy (kazkahs can be racist)

I agreed and moved on.

But now she contacted me again. She says she misses what we had, the guy she's seeing now is nothing compared to what we had. Basically, I was the best guy she's ever been with (and actually executed all of the points in your article quite naturally)

It was a blast to be with her. I do miss her.

But I also have a gut feeling it won't work.

yseult’s gut feeling is most likely right – it probably won’t work.

But gut feelings can be hard to listen to when powerful primal urges are dragging you back toward something your gut is telling you is best avoided.

To better arm you to listen to your gut – instead of your sex drive, scarcity, or loneliness – I’m going to lay out the nine (9) most important reasons to not take back an ex-girlfriend (or ex-wife, for that matter).

How to Stop a Woman from Doing Forbidden Things

Chase Amante's picture
stop a woman doing thingsThere are some things you just don’t want to let a girlfriend or wife do. Depending on how bad what she wants to do is, however, you’ll need to do that in different ways.

Sometimes even the most wonderful girl will try to do things you don’t want her to do.

What you do then – and how you handle that – is what this article is for.

After all, you can’t just stand by and do nothing while a woman runs slipshod over your relationship rules. Neither can you keep her caged and in chains. You’re probably not going to have her chaperoned everywhere.

You need means to effectively put a stop to bad behavior and rule-flouting by a woman partner – and those means will depend on the severity of the upcoming (or already committed) infraction.

Mind Your Dating Pool

Chase Amante's picture
women in bikinis at poolThe pool of women you date and hook up from is the same pool you’ll select long-term girlfriends and wives from. But pickup pools aren’t always the best spots to find great LTRs…

Every man has a certain pool of women he draws his dates and mates from.

This pool’s determined by where and how he meets women, and the kinds of women he attracts.

Men often choose dating pools for pleasure or convenience: the easiest girls to pick up; the sexiest girls to sleep with; the girls who are the best in bed. I recommend this while learning, and while building (or rebuilding) momentum.

There’s no faster way to learn nor build momentum than by picking up girls places that are easy for you, where women are in relative abundance, and ideally you really enjoy the pick up process.

However, there’s an issue here many men often don’t foresee until it is too late: you draw your long-term relationships from this same dating pool, too.

Yet the qualities you want in a long-term girlfriend will not always so perfectly align with the qualities the women you meet in the more convenient dating pools possess.

Tactics Tuesdays: Implicit Relationship Expectations

Chase Amante's picture
man and woman sitting together happily in bedYour behavior with a woman sets expectations for the relationship that is to come. Erratic behavior works against you. But consistent behavior makes things smooth.

We’ve talked on Girls Chase before about setting semi-explicit relationship expectations.

How to Act When You're Caught Red-Handed by a Woman

Chase Amante's picture
man caught cheating by woman holding other woman's braSo, your woman caught you red-handed. What can you do? Cry? Beg? Return fire? Don’t do any of that. Follow this 6-step process instead to handle it with minimal casualties.

Here's a fun topic!

Sooner or later, you're going to do something naughty, and some girl somewhere will catch you.

What should you do?

Should you:

  • Beg?
  • Cry?
  • Plead?
  • Fly into a rage?
  • Something else dramatic?

No! None of those things.

Instead, you must own it, remain chill, and wait for emotion to subside.