Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

Pickup vs. Seduction: Is There a Difference? (Yes!)

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

pickup vs. seduction
Pickup: the art of finding a girl to take home. Seduction: the art of influencing her mind, to create desire and other urges. How do the two relate… and which is better?

On Tuesday I talked about succeeding with closed or 'impossible' girls... inspired by a tussle over the subject we had on the Boards.

There's another nuance I want to discuss before we wrap this subject up though. That is the distinction between pickup and seduction.

While related -- and while the two terms are often used interchangeably (including by me) -- they are in fact different.

Knowing what the difference between the two terms is will aid your thinking about both... as well as your ability to use each area in the most effective way.

How to Get Those Attention Seeking Club Girls

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

attention seekers
You’re in a club. A girl walks by and grabs your ass. Then she bolts and won’t talk to you. WTF? She’s an attention seeking freak, and here’s how to get her in bed.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

Today I’ll respond to a question guys have asked on the forum. I assumed other men would enjoy having this question answered, too.

The question is: How do we deal with freaks in clubs?

Freakiness tends to be amped up to 11 in night club scenarios. Some of you may not be familiar with the term “freak.” It was coined by a deceased seducer called PlayerSupreme (RIP). According to him, there are three types of women:

  1. Good girls (nice, kind, affectionate girls); however, HE NEVER claimed that those girls were asexual Madonnas

  2. Hoes (the gold digger and status seeker)

  3. Freaks (weird girls who use their sexuality to gain power and get male attention; they tend to have higher sex drives than other women, but not always)

So, today’s discussion will be about how to deal with the third type of woman. For a better idea of what we are discussing, here’s an example.

Say you are at a club having fun. Out of the blue comes this girl who tells you something sexually explicit, acts in a sexually explicit way, or touches you in a sexually explicit way.

She may tell you how much she likes sucking dick, or perhaps she simply comes up to you, grinds her ass on you, or even touches your dick.

And you, happy as a clam, believe she is doing this because she is:

  • Super horny (easy prey)

  • Very sexually open, one of those “sexual women” (I have discussed this topic many times; this is usually a bias; those who seem most sexually open are not necessarily those who are)

  • Really into you

Pleased and excited, you reciprocate her move. You start showing sexual interest in return. You may touch her or make an overt move.

Only to realize that the moment you do, she walks away.

When you try to re-engage, she turns cold or starts ignoring you. It is frustrating. What the heck just happened? (I'll answer this in a bit.)

Even worse, you realize she’s now flirting with another guy, probably doing the same thing she did to you.

“But she was such easy prey; she showed so much interest in me.” You are a bit dumbfounded and creeped out.

The truth is, you have been played. And I will tell you how and why.

Choose Your Battlefield: Day Game, Night Game, or Cross Game

Daniel Adebayo's picture

By: Daniel Adebayo

types of pickup
Which pickup style should you specialize in, day game or night game? Or both? Each has its own skill set and takes considerable effort to learn. Here’s what to consider.

We all know cold approach is the best way to meet women.

But when you’re new to seduction, it can be difficult to decide. Day game or night game? Where should you focus your efforts? And where should you apply the advice you read here on Girls Chase?

While there are distinct strengths you will develop while making progress on each path, as well as specific weaknesses that students of each often struggle with, most seducers who get really good at socializing become adept at just half of the full cold approach experience.

So it’s quite natural even for experienced players to feel curious about the other side of seduction.

Now, just like the age-old debate on whether night game or day game is better, the answer to whether or not you should train yourself in the full cold approach experience will vary from person to person.

There are indisputable benefits to cross gaming, and if you’ve read my primer on this subject, you already have a clear picture of where I stand and why I arrived at this decision. It’s not required reading for today’s discussion, so if you haven’t read the primer, worry not.

Club Game: Get Noticed and Make the Right Impression with Girls

Cody Lyans's picture

By: Cody Lyans

pickup girls in clubs
Clubs are pits of sexual chaos, but nothing goes unnoticed. To position yourself as a guy who is destined to get laid, you’ve got to manage how you’re perceived.

So you are amid all the lights and the hammering bass, girls are in revealing outfits, and lots of alcohol is flowing. You want to get physical, but what do you do to make it happen?

In theory, everything is just right for mingling and getting things started, but in reality, most guys are hovering around the edges, and girls are self-isolating in their groups defending against the crass approaches that will inevitably be flung their way.

As a perceptive guy, you feel stuck in the middle, between the guys hovering around the edges and the girls who are assuming all incoming guys are missiles they ought to deflect.

You don’t want to be seen and rejected as one of “those guys,” but even worse, you don't want to just stand back and do nothing!

So how do you get physical in a club? By being observant and becoming skilled at reading and communicating body language.

Let's dive in.

How to Get Girls Who Seem Closed Off or Impossible

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

impossible girls
Some girls are closed off when you approach them. Some reject you – HARD! Some might even seem impossible to get. Is there a way to get these girls… or is there not?

Over on the discussion boards, we have of late had a dustup where a collection of several of our experienced members along with some other members led a small 'insurrection' against the most senior, experienced of us on there.

The gist of the insurrection was guys claiming, in effect, "You cannot get certain girls, now you old hands just admit it!"

This thinking seemed to stem from a few things, including (perhaps) my frequent suggestions to readers that most of the time, they should focus on screening for the women most receptive to them and their game.

This screening for receptive women is just an efficient, practical step. It is one every experienced guy employs.

Yet, just because you will usually do this, does not mean you treat non-receptive women as impossibly closed off.

Over the years, in addition to my "screen for girls who are receptive to you" posts, I have also authored many other pieces about getting girls who seem disinterested, or like hard cases, lost causes, or otherwise impossible to get.

The key is to be able to hold both concepts in the mind at once: most of the time, it is simply more efficient to focus on the women most receptive to you. Yet, also available to you are those women who are not at first into you, but whom you are nevertheless able to seduce.

Note before we begin: this article is a guide for advanced players, and should not be used by beginners (or probably intermediates either). HOWEVER... I strongly suggest beginners and intermediates read it, so that it is clear that even while we are suggesting you usually move on from disinterested girls, these girls are not actually totally out of reach, and there will come a time, if you continue down the road to seduction mastery, where these girls enter into your circle.

16 Awesome Texting Tips Few Men Know

Tony Depp's picture

By: Tony Depp

texting a girl

For many of you sorry bastards, texting a girl can be an awful, anxiety-inducing journey of existential despair. What to text? When? How long should the text be? Should I be funny? What do I do?

Just chillax, brother. Let uncle Tony guide you through the mysterious world of women, texting a girl, and making sense of it all.

11 Things Women Want in a Man (Their Insults Tell You)

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

things women want in a man
Women can tell you what things they want in a man… if you listen to their choice of insults. Things they might never admit consciously come spilling out.

Well, there you are online, minding your own business commenting on something, when what appears but a wild Angry Female Commentator!

And boy is she miffed!

She pulls out a few select stingers from her bag of Mean Things To Say, and ouch, they hurt!

You retreat to lick your wounds, smarting from a quick blast of pointed verbal abuse from some woman you don't know, who disagreed with what you had to say.

It's a not-uncommon scenario guys run into on the Internet. Sometimes in real life, too.

Even if you're more 'lurker' than 'participant', you've no doubt seen scads of men shredded by Angry Female Commentators in various comment sections of various websites... or at various parties or other social events.

'Small penis', 'lives at home', 'just a misogynist', and various other slanderous/libelous statements are such aggravated women's stock-in-trade.

However, if you look behind the words, there's an interesting psychological curiosity people communicate when they launch their insults.

That is this: we only insult people on measures we personally care about.

Put another way, by looking at women's insults, we can get a view to what things women want in a man... and also what they don't.

How to Use Plausible Deniability to Get Her to Leave with You

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

how to get her to leave with you
Women often resist going home with you because they don’t want to appear slutty. To bypass this issue, all she needs is plausible deniability, which you can provide.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

Today I want to discuss a phase that many men struggle with: the extraction phase. It’s a phase prone to resistance and also the time you get an indication of whether you have successfully built compliance and dealt with her resistance even though other factors like mood changes, wildcards, and logistical factors may pop up at the last minute.

Therefore, I consider this phase important to master. You may get lucky, things may go smoothly, and she goes home with you without you delivering a tight game. But that is simply pure luck, and you cannot rely on this.

You must always try to go for the extraction, whether you feel the vibe is perfect or subprime. The number one reason men do not get laid consistently is that they do not make an invitation for it. They do not try to get the girl to leave with them; they do not try to extract.

Some guys may be too nervous about doing it, or it could be they want to protect their ego and not take the chance to ruin the connection. It feels so much better for your ego to leave a girl, falsely believing you could have banged her. But the truth is, if she did not leave with you, there is no “could have banged her.” You either bang her or you don’t. If you do not try to extract, you will never know.

So, always be extracting.

Even if the vibe is not right, and closing time is near, it is better to just go for it. You never know. Maybe she is an easy one; maybe she is not that into you. She might just decide that it is late and wants to have fun. You don’t know unless you try.

So, always be extracting.

In the past, I’ve discussed how to extract and get her to leave with you. I have also gone over how to go to a girl’s place (the system is very similar, just a few tweaks added).

Here’s the system:

  • Reach a high note (generate compliance, reach a peak in emotions and compliance, and strike)

  • Give a reason to leave (“It’s so loud in here.”)

  • Find an excuse to go back to your place (“Do you like wine? Ah, good, let’s get back to my place and continue this conversation.”)

  • Lower the pressure (“I don’t live far away.”)

  • Persist (back off, build more compliance, handle potential resistance)

  • Try again if you fail (persistence)

This template applies here as well and is probably the standard model most would agree with.

What we will discuss today is how to use plausible deniability to aid your extraction.

We’ve examined this subject before, but I want to give my take on it and add some key points.

A Little Vulnerability Is Okay, but How Much Should You Reveal?

Varoon Rajah's picture

By: Varoon Rajah

how to show vulnerability
Insecurity and vulnerability are not the same thing. Women run from insecurity but find a little vulnerability endearing. So how much should you show her?

As I discussed in my last article, anxiety is very bad for your endeavors with women. End of story!

Unfortunately, women perceive anxiety as a weakness, and often revealing the anxiety to women can cause them to lose all attraction for you. Now the key here is in revealing anxiety. Everyone feels anxious once in a while, some more than others. Sometimes anxiety is genetic, and it’s within a person’s persona to feel anxious periodically.

However, just because you feel anxiety doesn’t mean you have to reveal it to anyone. More importantly, even when women see you’re feeling anxious, it doesn’t mean you have to reveal the true source of your anxiety to them!

Notice I said when. Women are naturally super sensitive to a guy’s vibe; by instinct, women are fully sensitive to human vibes. Think of the bond and senses women have to take care of and raise babies, even before the age of technology, farming, and civilization. It’s important to note that women can transmute another human’s emotions. You can transfer a sexual state from yourself to a woman if you let her feel allowed and if she actively follows your lead and dominance!

If you feel anxiety in the presence of a woman, she’s going to feel it. If you’re prone to frequent anxiety, you’ll inevitably feel anxiety at some point with a woman. For some guys, it’s feeling anxious on the approach, and this can mess up their approach vibe every time! Some get nervous about the first date. And for other guys, it can be about what to do with her when they get her home. For the longest time, I struggled with last-minute resistance and got anxious in the moment right before sex.

No matter what, if you feel anxiety, you can bet that she’ll feel it, too.

The good news is that you can change the source of anxiety over time. What makes you anxious can go away with concerted effort and practice by putting yourself in front of the anxiety-inducing situation and succeeding over and over. This is sure to change your body’s perception of what was previously a threat. And I can attest that it works. Unlike before, these days, I get super excited and horny when I have a girl at home.

In the meantime, you need to figure out how to be vulnerable in the right way when your anxiety comes up.

How to Transition to Touch in the Middle of a Seduction

Cody Lyans's picture

By: Cody Lyans

touch seduction
It's ideal to introduce touch very early in a seduction. And if you don't right away, you need to do so eventually. These tips will help you transition smoothly.

Let’s say you are at a social event, and you are hitting it off with a girl. She’s laughing at all your jokes, touching your arm now and then, and staying with you as the night goes on. Everything is going great; she’s giving you all the signs she likes you and is following your lead. But under the surface, you can sense she is still a bit cautious. You know you are meant to shift the level of intimacy forward but aren’t quite sure how to change the tone without her backing off.

So how can you make sure she likes you and set down the foundations for physical contact without scaring her away?

Turning things physical is foundationally one of the most critical areas in seduction because it is the “execution” phase of a seduction. In theory, a seduction can look good, but as you execute your actions, the reality may not match your intuition. The difficulty in changing how much you are touching each other comes from the dual nature of physical contact; it can be alarming and make a girl feel threatened, or it can be soothing and make her feel like she is where she wants to be.

The reasons for this dual nature are complicated. I will help you navigate them better, because if you can improve your transitions into physical intimacy, it will improve every aspect of your interactions with women.