Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

Wingman Guide, Pt. 5: Calibrating to Your Wing

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

wingman calibrationTo get the most out of picking up girls with a wingman, the wings need to calibrate to each other. That means working together – and balancing each other’s game.

Hey guys and welcome back.

Today, I want to discuss calibration and additional strategies you can pull off with a wing. This post is an expansion to help perfect your wingmanning skills. We will discuss everything from in-set calibration pointers to state control, and decision-making with your wing.

Up to this point in our guide to wingmanning, we’ve covered a lot of information that may seem exhaustive. Remember, a perfect pickup and seduction does not exist. You will rarely use all the material you know and pull it off perfectly. It’s good to know that often you won’t need it.

The goal is to strive for perfection by giving you as many tools in these posts as possible to get the best results, and you can add or subtract tips and techniques depending on how you and your wing work together. Some methods may suit you; some may not. You may need some strategies to solve potential sticking points, and you should focus on applying these depending on your situation.

So, let’s go through some valuable tips and tricks.

Study: Women Have the Best Sex with Disagreeable Men

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

women have the best sex with disagreeable menWomen have better sex with disagreeable, sexually uninhibited, conscientious men. Such men simply BEHAVE in ways that raise the pleasure for their partners.

In yet another blow for nice guys, a study reveals what we’ve all long known: women enjoy sex more with disagreeable bad boys.

In particular, the study found that women have the best sex with men who have a few key traits:

  • Men who are more disagreeable (i.e., more prone to doing what they want).

  • Men who are less sexually inhibited (i.e., more prone to getting wild in bed).

  • Men who are more conscientious (i.e., more likely to do a good job in bed).

So, girls like sex better with dominant bad boys who are at ease with sex and take pride in giving women orgasms. No great surprises here!

The findings are straightforward – but let’s discuss them anyway just to clear up any confusion.

Tactics Tuesdays: 7 Example Stories for Early Conversation

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

example stories to tell in early conversationIt’s early into a conversation and you’d like to tell a story. What do you talk about? These 7 examples help you figure out just what tale to tell.

In a comment on my article “How to Tell a Story that Rivets and Captivates”, Greg remarks:

Very interesting article, thank you, I really appreciated it. But now that I know how to tell a story (the form), the problem is what stories to tell (the content). A long list of story examples to tell (one sentence per example, not the complete stories, just the basic idea) (like 30 stories exemples at least) could help in developing or finding one's own stories. Because I don't know about others, but for me, I feel like I don't have any stories to tell.

Sure, story examples. We can talk about some of those.

For this article, I’m going to focus on early conversation stories, since that’s the place the most guys have the most trouble. E.g., “How do I get the storytelling started with a girl I’m talking to?”

We’ll break it down into two categories for this piece: “crazy thing” stories and “cool DHV” stories. Before we begin, I want to preface with a note on the ‘recency’ requirement for early conversation stories.

How to Let a Girl Go

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

how to let a girl goAre you stuck pining for or pursuing a girl you can’t get or have? Then you need to let that girl go. Easier said than done right? Well here’s HOW to do it.

It’s not an uncommon position for men to find themselves in: there’s this girl a guy’s fallen for, and he just can’t let her go.

I talked about the intoxicating, transfixing aspects of this kind of single-minded fixation upon an individual girl in my article “Can't Stop Thinking About Her? Here's Why You Need to Meet More Girls.” I know that one struck a chord, too, because it’s been read over a million times. Among the other 3257 articles on this website written over the last 16 years, only twelve have more pageviews.

Today I want to talk about one specific aspect of becoming fixated on an individual woman or girl: how to let her go.

How to detach, move on, and live a life without being haunted by a woman it’s best you forgot.

Wingman Guide, Pt. 4: Closing Girls w/ a Wing (Doubles)

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

closing with a wingmanIt’s time to pull the girls you picked up with a wingman. Follow these battle-tested action plans to get girls out of the venue and alone & back home.

Hey guys and welcome back.

Previously, we have discussed wingmanning rules and strategies suitable for going solo and doing doubles, like split-pushes. This strategy is challenging and may not be ideal for beginners. We’ve also talked about the basics of wingmanning, from opening and hooking with a wingman, plus introducing your wing into the set, to running the set together.

If all goes well and the set is ready to pull, you must know how to manage this successfully. Sometimes, you and your wing may split up with each girl, going your separate ways. When this happens, it becomes a split-push, similar to solo game, which we won’t discuss today.

But often, when you have a set with your wing, you’ll want to take advantage of the double situation. Likely, the girls want to stick together, at least for a while, and you will most usually pull together.

How do you best seal the deal in these double situations? That’s what we will discuss below. You’ll learn how to handle those times when you and your wing are together with your girls until you are all at an afterparty. Sure, you may split up before then, and that’s completely fine. We will assume this does not happen so I can break down everything from meeting (see my last post) until she is in your bed (today’s post).
So, let’s assume:

  • You’ve opened the girls.

  • You and your wing have hooked both girls.

  • You both have an interaction going, and all is going well.

Undersexed Women, Girlfriends Cause Heaps of Drama

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

undersexed women cause heaps of dramaWhen women are fertile and sexually frustrated, they cause drama. How you avoid this drama is straightforward: sex her mind out when she ovulates.

I can’t believe I haven’t written an article on this before, but it just came to mind I haven’t. When women aren’t getting sexed enough, they cause mountains of drama.

This is an incontrovertible law of female nature. If you haven’t learned this rule, you may find drama exploding from women out of seemingly nowhere. One day she’s affectionate and horny… then the next day she’s an erupting volcano of malevolent fury. What happened?

You’ll get a dozen different explanations, blames, and excuses from her about what precipitated the drama. But the real source of drama if you trace it back is this: either you didn’t lay her at all, or you didn’t lay her well enough.

How to Test Girls for Interest BEFORE You Approach (Pinging)

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

test girls' interest before you approachBefore you approach a girl, test her for interest. By doing this – using ‘pings’ – you can virtually eliminate rejection, and find many more yesses.

How to Want a Girl Less Than She Wants You

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

how to want a girl less than she wants youIf you’re the one who approaches a girl, how can you want a girl less than she wants you? It seems like a conundrum… yet many guys do it every day.

Beneath my article about Instagram dating’s uncomfortable truths, reader Sub-Zero asked the following:

Could you clarify things for me when it comes to wanting the woman less than she wants you when you’re the one approaching her and asking her out?

I never could quite understand this, and I’ve read your desireless article a few times, but it still isn’t working for me.

How do we want the woman less than she wants us when she isn’t putting that much effort in, and we’re the ones that are pursuing her?

It’s a simple question but it has a lot of merit! How can you want a girl less than she wants you, when YOU are the one making the approach? Are you just kidding yourself? How can this be?

At the beginning, you may indeed need to ‘kid yourself’ to a degree – though there are ways to do this more effectively. In the end, though, you will arrive at a place where you are able to approach yet truly want the women you approach less than they want you (assuming, that is, that they are interested!).

So, below, let’s talk about how to want a girl less than she wants you.

Wingman Guide, Pt. 3: Opening & Hooking Girls w/ a Wing

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

opening with a wingmanOpening girls with a wingman (and hooking them) is an art. With this guide, you’ll have the most effective ways to get them roped in and talking.

Hey guys. Welcome back.

Previously, we discussed easy-to-pull-off wingman strategies: “split-push,” when you and your wing split and do your thing, not requiring wingmanning techniques like calibration and synergy with your wing. Doing “doubles” when you and your wing actively seek to meet women together, run the same set, and go for one girl from the same group is much harder to pull off than the split-push strategy. We also went over hybrid approaches that use split-push as a starting point, with the possibility of doing doubles later.

In some situations, you need to do a double:

  • Two-sets (hard to deal with solo, especially with isolation)

  • Sets when both you and your wing get a hook

  • Sets where you need assistance (only if your wing is skilled)

Some guys, like me, love doing doubles with a great wing. You get a special ego boost when you and a wing pull your own girl together. The vibe, the talks, and the laughs the next day are priceless. You must experience it to know it.

Today, I will go through basic techniques to use when doing doubles, whether you end up in a hybrid style by chance or actively go for it with your wing. These techniques can increase your chance of succeeding. Note that today’s post serves as a basic guide. I will get into more advanced strategies in a few weeks for more seasoned seducers (or curious beginners).

Girls' Dates & Exes Are Never as Perfect as You Imagine

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

girls dates are not perfectGirls will giddily talk up the guys they are (or were) going out with. Yet the actual man is never quite as impressive as the picture girls paint…

Several weeks ago a reader named Jason H. asked the following on my article about the reasons for there being so many single people:

Have you any advise in seeing things from the women's POV and feeling how women feel attracted differently from us men?

I've been reading Girlschase long enough to know that women and men at a GUT level are attracted to and prioritize different things.

The men part I GET at a deep gut/intuitive level when I read the articles. "I'm like yeah that makes sense!". Of course we prioritise youth and beauty. But I experience a cognitive dissonance to some extent when I read about what women prioritise with sexual attraction - because I don't FEEL the same way they do about dominance, humor, confidence & competence. These things don't turn me on at a gut level.

So I'm fighting the part of me that feels women prioritise - looks, height,muscles at low body fat or popularity. Dating apps (I'm not on it) but of men who are on it are competing with the only factor that's assessed on it -looks. So when I hear a female friend say I matched with a 6ft4 guy who is into martial arts he sounds like fun - it irritates me because I'm like well 'I'm pretty sure they value these other traits more' but they match a good looking guy or very tall guy and they are excited to meet him.

I want to be attractive enough so that women feel this same way more instantly. I've had good success by improving fundamentals and bedding women. The difference is it takes me longer to flip attraction triggers. I want it happening quicker and more passively.
I've come to realise is women have various attraction triggers and it's more complex than men.
- A tall man can trigger their attraction switch - which then can be built on
- A popular guy who is preselected can trigger their attraction switch (has happened to me several times)
- Dominance, humour, competence and confidence etc all can trigger it.

What I've come to realise is that men need a BUY-IN. So an average looking guy at average height needs to have excellence in SOME form that women value: showing competence at something they value fitness/sport/music/art or dominance/humour/popularity - whatever it is

Following your article on Tao of Steve I've focused on becoming excellent fitness/physique wise which has led to more attention from women: more stares, smiles,comments which is all positive. While working on fundamentals across the board.

Back to my original question.

I know these things are true. Even objectively I see women with men similar to themselves but less physically attractive.

Yet I'm struggling to overcome this part of me that's obsessed with thinking women's no.1 priority is this. All it takes is a face value comment from a woman saying they like tall guys, or that guy is easy on the eyes/amazing body. Yet I don't hear comments about that guy is so funny he turns me on. Or that guy is sexy (while also not referring to a handsome/tall/ripped guy).

How do I overcome this insecurity/cognitive dissonance?
How am I able to understand or FEEL what women feel at a gut level about attraction without PROJECTING my own feelings?

I really like the concept of talking about understanding female attraction at a gut level.

However, Jason H. brings up another point here, which I think is more important to address FIRST:

Namely, how people work to present an image of themselves as successful by playing up how awesome their dates and lovers are… and how if you aren’t careful you can get totally suckered by it!

Everybody does this… but girls do it more. Girls are the masters at it. Girls will tell you constantly how picky they are, how excellent their ex-boyfriends were, how refined their taste is. And the illusion will hold! … right up until you actually meet the guys these girls are going with (and say to yourself “Huh?!”).

So before we talk about understanding female attraction at an intuitive, gut level (which I still would like to talk about), FIRST let’s make sure we understand this equally important concept, that the way women describe their standards and the men in their lives and the way those men actually are tend to be two very different things.