Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

How to Keep a Girl’s Self-Esteem High to Make Sex Happen

Varoon Rajah's picture

By: Varoon Rajah

her self-esteem and sex
Before having sex, a woman needs to feel she’s not putting her ego at risk. Here’s what you need to know to manage her self-esteem before and after the act.

Welcome back to the female self-esteem series! I hope these articles have shown you how important it is to keep women’s self-esteem high, as well as your own.

Nobody wants to screw or be involved with someone with low self-esteem; except for some abusive relationships which can be addictive in their own right. Most women want to be with men who make them feel good about themselves, and all women want to feel sexually validated and have more ravishing sex than all their friends.

In Part 1, we shared stories about how two different girls auto-rejected during the escalation process because they felt low self-esteem.

In Part 2, I shared how self-esteem matters when you’re on a date with a girl, and described ways to amp up her self-esteem to close the deal.

In Part 3, we covered self-esteem issues in the bedroom and how they affect women’s feelings for you.

Now, in the final installment, let’s talk about calibrating self-esteem to keep it high, and what to do if you mess up and lower her self-esteem.

Tactics Tuesdays: How to Future Project

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

future projection
If you can future project, you can lead a woman to imagine you as a part of her future. This is no mythical trick -- it only takes words to do.

One of your prime objectives with a new woman is to have her think of you in a different way from how she thinks of other men. Most men to her are nameless, faceless strangers. Even if they're attractive, if she feels no connection to them, they'll struggle with her.

Yet once a woman feels a connection with you, and envisions the possibilities with you, it changes. She won't dismiss you out of hand. She'll consider what you say to her. She opens up to your suggestions.

One tactic to 'fast track' women envisioning themselves with you is future projection. To project something is to push it out and paint a picture of it. When you future project, you paint a picture of the future.

Paint a good-enough picture, and a gal can start to feel like the two of you are already close to something like boyfriend and girlfriend... even if you've only just met.

What Traits Do the Best Pickup Artists Have in Common?

Tony Depp's picture

By: Tony Depp

best pickup artists traits
Want to get good with women but think you’re not the right ‘type’ for it? Here are the most common traits I see in the best pickup artists I know. This may surprise you.

I want to clear up some misconceptions about learning game — primarily what sorts of guys succeed with pickup versus those who don’t.

In my humble opinion, a master at pickup is simply someone willing to face rejection more than the average man. He can approach more women in a week than most do in a year.

My opinion may not represent the rest of Girls Chase, as some of the guys may have different viewpoints. And if there are differences of opinion, I think they may stem from the fact that we all have different styles, which have been developed based on our strengths.

Not every pickup artist has the same strengths; therefore, we all have different styles that suit us best.

So of course there are exceptions, because there are many nuanced factors involved in learning game, and the path isn’t the same (nor can it be) for every guy.

Also, you don't have to have these traits to do 'well' with pickup, nor must you go through what I did to do 'well' with pickup. But guys who tend to do REALLY, REALLY well — as in coach level good — usually have a few common traits. I'll list them below, and if you don't have these traits but want to acquire or develop them as motivation, or if you'd like to gain the benefits they provide, I'll provide solutions to help you out.

Don't Chicken Out with Women; "Next Time" Never Comes

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

dating next time

There are many common errors men make in dating. These errors sabotage in small ways or large ways with women. The errors put guys through endless frustrations... usually of their own doing.

We'll talk about an error today in the way guys often think about "next time." Because it's sort of a big one, but it's likely one you won't stop to reconsider too often.

If you sift back through your memories, I bet you will find instances where you thought "I'll do it next time." See a beautiful girl? "I'll talk to her next time." Talk to beautiful girl? "I'll ask her out next time." On a date with beautiful girl? "I'll ask her home next time." Home alone with beautiful girl? "I'll make a move on her next time." As soon as you read these, I know you know the thoughts are counterproductive. If you're like most men, you still have them sometimes anyway though, don't you?

What's not included are the 'next time' thoughts you don't have. Like "That girl rejected me, but I'll get it next time." Or "My approach sucked. Next time will be better." Or "It's all gone tits-up with this girlfriend. But I'll do things right with my next one."

Men have these 'positive next time' thoughts far less often than they should. Yet they are a key to staying sane in the moment, and heading off neediness before it crops up.

What to Do If She Wants a Relationship Before Sex (Video)

Hector Castillo's picture

By: Hector Castillo

So she wants a relationship before sex? You don’t even have to date much to encounter this.

You’ll run into girls you like and who like you, but when it comes time to have sex, they have one issue – they want you to be their boyfriend or be serious with them before they give up the cat.

Why?

You have to give up your sexual freedom in order to get in bed with her? Some guys are okay with that, but for those of you who don’t see this is as a fair trade, you’re not alone.

In this video, I explore the flaws in this type of trade and how to respond to women who propose it.

The Social Dynamics of Female State Control in Pickup

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

social dynamics
It’s not always obvious why a girl ejects from a seduction. Let’s take a look at some nuanced aspects of social dynamics as they relate to Female State Control.

Hey guys, and welcome back. Today I will finish up where we last left off. Last week’s discussion was about social frame, focusing on social value, a key aspect of social frame and seduction in general.

Social frame is a bundle term for everything concerning attraction and attractiveness on a social level. A good social frame lets you match with her socially. It contributes to whether or not a girl will feel it is okay to hook up with you. If you lack social frame, you may risk causing her to regain control of her emotions and back off, despite being stimulated by you emotionally. That's what we call Female State Control (FSC), which has been the primary topic of all my posts these last few weeks.

Previously we discussed how:

  • Social value is vital to social frame, and why it’s important to have at least a minimum threshold of social value

  • Social value is relative to where you are at with attracting her

  • You can increase your social value through different techniques and concepts

Today we will discuss another aspect of social frame — social dynamics. We’ll look at the dynamics that take place in the interaction, and how they can make you win the girl or lose her.

This post should present little new information to those who are accustomed to pickup literature, although a recap is always nice. Also, you will see how these concepts relate to social frame and perhaps gain a new perspective on how they affect the interaction and outcome. For this reason, I would recommend even advanced guys read this article.

Let’s get to it.

How to Keep Girls Addicted in Relationships

Varoon Rajah's picture

By: Varoon Rajah

keep girls addicted in relationships
We’ve all experienced or have seen relationships go stale and die, but they don’t have to. The secret is to keep her addicted with volatility and unpredictability.

I’ve noticed some interesting patterns with a good friend of mine in the city. He’s been seeing this girl for a long time. He met her via day game and it ended up with sex on the first date. It’s been several years now, and he’s been seeing her like a girlfriend, while still gaming and sleeping with other girls discreetly on the side once in a while.

I think he would be trying to meet more women, but he seems to be pretty satiated with her at the moment. Whenever I see him, it’s always her that seems to be messaging and chasing after him. From what he tells me, their sex life is great. She always messages him to get together and sees him 2–4 times a week. It seems that they have wild sex virtually the entire time they’re together. He says she might be doing it to keep him from meeting other girls, which she knows he’s fully capable of doing.

This is a different pattern from what most guys do when they’re with women. They get comfortable, then play it safe in a relationship. Men try to keep their relationship stable — and effectively boring. It’s because the majority of guys are generally safe and boring by nature, so it’s their normal inclination to do the same with the women in their life.

On the other hand, women thrive on change, stimulation, and challenge, especially with shifting feelings and emotions. It’s even better when they can tie the source of those shifting emotions to the man they're with (women do this with bad boys, after all).

How to Pick Up Girls at the Mall

Tony Depp's picture

By: Tony Depp

pick up girls at the mall
Despite the stories about creeps harassing girls at malls, these female-rich locales are among the best places to meet women. Here’s how to do it right.

For the many years I’ve been teaching guys how to meet women in the daytime, I’d say that (other than the beach) there’s no better location than the mall. And I’ll admit, I’m a bit of an expert at picking up girls at the mall.

The main issue most men have with malls is that it’s not outside, so it feels different. It’s always like this: a guy who’s used to meeting girls at bars can’t do malls; a guy who’s used to streets can’t do malls, and so on. It’s something about the change from the comfortable to uncomfortable, familiar to unfamiliar environments that throws guys off.

That’s why, as a student looking to improve your game, you should put yourself into as many new situations, in as many different environments as possible. Then you're much less likely to get stuck when something unexpected happens.

For example: you spot a pretty girl walking in the mall, so you start to approach her, and she ducks into a clothing store. Oh, now you can’t approach her because she’s in a store, so you stand around outside scratching your nuts, waiting for her to come back out, feeling more and more creepy with every minute, and then just give up.

But if you’d taken the time to put yourself into a situation like this before, you’d be prepared when it inevitably happens again.

Not being able to approach a girl walking into a store at the mall is like not being able to meet women on the dance floor at the bar. Half the venue is useless to you, so you have half the opportunity to meet your dream girl.

6 Ways Online Dating Compares vs. Meeting Women in Real Life

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

online dating comparison
Dating apps and online dating are a fast, low effort way to meet loads of partners. But are they a perfect substitute for real life?

Over the last 15 years, the way people use the Internet to date has changed, in some ways.

But in other ways, it's remained exactly the same.

The first time I tried online dating, in 2004, it was still sort of a new, fringe thing. There weren't that many people dating online. There were around 1,000 online dating websites at the time (844, according to Wikipedia). Today, according to Forbes, 1,000 new online dating sites open each year. Match.com and Adult Friend Finder were the big fish then (the founder of AFF, Andrew Conru, invented online dating in 1994). Scammers were already well established; a clever spam message from a gorgeous girl-next-door type with a phone number two digits short claiming she saw me on Match.com, where I'd recently deactivated my account, lured unlucky-in-love 2004 me into paying $50 to for some fake dating site before I'd figured out what happened. Online dating at the time had a reputation of being a place desperate losers and awkward weirdoes went to. If you tried online dating, there was probably a reason, and that reason was likely an unfortunate one.

Since 2004, I've tapped online dating to meet women in various ways. Online is a useful supplement, but it's always taken the back seat to real life for me. Of late though I've seen online dating and dating apps become a lot more prominent among men. Meanwhile the portion of their women guys meet in real life is falling.

This is not a good thing for men, for many reasons. You may not want to hear it, but swiping your way through a dating app and thinking you are doing "game" is often not going to lead you where you want... unless you have a very clear idea about what you want.

But it's not all bad news and gloom. Sometimes, the right dating app can be just what you need.

Today let's compare online dating and dating apps to meeting women in the real world. We'll compare along six (6) dimensions:

  1. Quality

  2. Quantity

  3. Intentions

  4. Effort

  5. Risk

  6. Satisfaction

Let's go.

The ONE THING That Drives Women Crazy Above All Else (Video)

Hector Castillo's picture

By: Hector Castillo

What is the single most attractive quality that women see in a man?

You probably won’t guess it.

It’s not money. It’s not looks. It’s not height. It’s not a big dick. It’s not charm. It’s not intelligence.

Confused yet?

You’ll see, and I’ll explain.