Secrets to Getting Girls: Don't Let Her Go

There’s a variety of reasons why women walk away from a conversation. Could be they’re bored. Could be they’re feeling uncomfortable. Could be they don’t think you like them or that you’re making fun of them too much or too hard. Could be their friends are pressuring them to go.

But whatever the reason, it’s in your best interest NOT to let them leave. They eject, leave, and walk away, and chances are you will never see them again. So yes, you can let them go, and tell yourself, “Well, I didn’t like that girl all that much anyway,” or, “No worries, there are plenty of fish in the sea.”

OR, you can put up a fight, and do what needs to be done to get her to stay. A guy who’s even somewhat seasoned can use the extra two, five, or ten minutes he gets from stopping an ejecting girl to turn things around, get her investing more, and get her feeling differently about him than she was before. If you do things right, you can correct all kinds of issues.

That’s what this post is about. Stopping women from ejecting. Getting them to stay. Giving yourself that second chance after you’ve messed things up because hey, we all do. Nobody shoots a hole-in-one every time he tees off.

So, that said, here are some tools you can use to stop them in their tracks and get them sticking around. Keep in mind that stopping them from leaving and getting them to stay is, in fact, getting a pretty big chunk of compliance out of them too, which does all kinds of good things for your cause. Let’s take a look.

Take Her Idea and Make It Yours

When she goes to leave, adopt her idea and make it yours. You’re then free to modify it to your liking.

A few weeks ago, I was hanging with a buddy and a couple of girls we’d just met out on a dance floor. The girl I was talking to said, “Well, we’re going to go,” and started turning to leave.

I said, “Yeah, it’s way too loud in here. Let’s go outside.” I then had her take my arm, and led her outside and down the stairs to a lounge right next door. Her friend and my friend followed behind us. We ended up spending the next twenty minutes together before I had to run, and she was flirting like crazy.

You can do this with all kinds of situations. Just always be sure to interpret her ejecting as being something about the situation or the circumstances, not about you.

For instance, if she says, “We’re going to go get a drink,” you can say, “Yeah, I’m parched. Let’s hit the bar.” If you meet her at the mall or a grocery store and she says, “Well, I should finish my shopping,” you can say, “Oh right, how horrible of me. Here I am distracting you from your mission. Let’s get to shopping,” and then start walking with her.

The REAL fun comes in when you decide to first agree with her plan, and then take her off course. For instance:

Girl: I have to go to the bathroom.

You: Tell me about it. These drinks are catching up to me. Let’s go. [you start walking but, along the way] Wait, hold up a second. Come here for one minute. [draw her over to a bar, a corner, etc., and build compliance and get her laughing so that she no longer is trying to leave]

Tell Her to Stay For a Few Minutes

When she gets up to go, tell her to stay for a few minutes – two minutes, five minutes, ten minutes, whatever you need to say to get her to change her mind and rejoin you. i.e.:

Girl: [standing] Well, I’m going to go.

You: Stay for two minutes. I have something I really have to show you before you leave.

Girl: I really have to go.

You: We won’t be long. Two minutes and then you can go.

Girl: I can't.

You: Stay for two minutes, that's it. If I don't let you go in two minutes, you can kick me in the shin, ok? Now, sit.

Girl: Haha, ok.

Push for it a few times and she usually will stay (if you push hard enough, it's amazing how effective this is), and it will likely be for a lot longer than two minutes (provided you get everything back on course). If she goes to get up again, just repeat the same process again. You can even say the same exact thing you said earlier to get her to sit down, and oftentimes it will work. Feel free to grab her hand and firmly lead her (for more advanced guys; beginners, be careful with this and err on the side of making sure you're not forcing her into anything or making her feel cornered -- she has to WANT to join you).

Differ With Her

If she declares she’s going to go across the street to ABC Bar, you just say, “No, stay here / come with me. [whatever you’re doing] is about 8000 times more fun than ABC Bar. THIS is where the party is. Stay here / come here.” Then just keep insisting and giving her commands until she complies.

If she tries telling you she really has to do something, just differ with her, i.e.:

Girl: I really do have to go.

You: No you don't. You need to stop and do something fun for a change, that's what you need to do.

Girl: I wish I could.

You: You can. Come with me, my lady. [hold out your hand]

Girl: I can't!

You: Yes you can. Look how easy it is. Just come this way.

Girl: I can't! haha

You: Take my hand and all your troubles will fade away.

Keep persisting like this (with a smile on your face!) and she more likely than not will take your hand and accompany you.

Once you get girls to change their minds and stick with you, the toughest part is done, and those girls who had been about to leave you now have a brand new shot with.

Now, all you need to do is convince them to STAY with you ;)

Have fun gentlemen,
Chase Amante