How to Attract Women: The Guide | Girls Chase

How to Attract Women: The Guide

Chase Amante

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Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

how to attract womenOnce upon a time, I sat in a college dorm room wondering how to attract women.

I mean, in high school I'd had them chasing after me, at least some of the time, but then I went to university and that all disappeared. Coupled with my lack of social skills, I soon found myself both alone, and un-pursued.

So, I tried anything I could think of. I got into music and performed on-stage. I made myself stand out however I could in my classes. I started peacocking with flashy clothes and accessories. I even tried buying pheromones from the Internet -- the jury's still out if that did me any good.

But despite those efforts, I still didn't have any women in my life. Some of it got me noticed -- a lot of pretty girls were paying a lot of attention to me. But was I attracting them? Here's how Dictionary.com defines the word:

“Attract: to draw by appealing to the emotions or senses, by stimulating interest, or by exciting admiration; allure; invite: to attract attention; to attract admirers by one's charm.

Well, they may have been interested, but they certainly weren't around me too much. So, at best, maybe I was part of the way there.

Most men, I discovered, find themselves in the same boat. They try a bunch of things, not sure what, exactly, it is that'll work best at getting women attracted... only to keep realizing that the things they're trying aren't working as well as they'd hoped. Anywhere near as well as they'd hoped. Some guys even all but lose hope entirely.

How I learned to be a man who knew how to attract women and inspire them to chase him and pursue him and desire him is the story I want to share with you here.

Furthermore, I want you to avoid the scenario I was in, of having to figure this mostly out from scratch -- so I'm going to give you 7 tips you can start using right now, today, to get yourself becoming more attractive to women.

Without further ado: How to Attract Women: The Guide.

Comments

Houseofjacques's picture

Hey Chase.

I've been reading your material for a while now. I've read some other pick-up material before that but none of them struck a cord with me as much as yours. I like your approach, I feel it's more sincere and more useful in the long-run. I'm looking to become a powerful, sexy, slow-moving, slow-talking man who pulls women towards him. Lines and routines won't get me there.

However, some of the pick-up material that I've read and that I'm planning to read -on routines, creating emotions, hypnosis, you name it- seem to be very effective. I like reading about this stuff because it's fun and because I think behind all the lines there's some psychological truths -being hard to get, being the prize, creating emotions- However, using them makes me cringe. I don't wanna be a pale imitation of some guy I don't even know. However, would you suggest introducing routines and canned stuff into approaches, as just another tool? I'm reading The Game by Neil Strauss and got to the part where there's this guy "anchoring" emotions in a girl through some hypnosis kind of thing, and it seems to work. How do you feel about this sort of thing?

I'm the kind of guy you speak about in your article. I'm tall, I have good posture, I dress well and I'm good looking. I've girls looking at me all the time. I know I'm attractive. But I'm a HUGE, HUUUUGE wimp. I rarely ever work the never to approach -I have crippling approach anxiety- and when I do I don't move things fast. Nonetheless, thanks to you and some other writers that I trust, I've begun moving faster than ever before. I've been shot down so far, but I'm not fretting about it.

If there's one thing I've taken from your blog, is that you have to move fast to get results.

Keep up the good work.
Cheers.

Brent's picture

Chase,

Hope all is well with you! I have not commented on here in a while so I figured why not today. This is great stuff and many guys could benefit from reading this article many times through.

Just to comment on Houseofjacques post above I was right there with you a few years ago man. I've been reading about attraction and the so called "pick up" community for almost 4 years now. I've read "The Game" and basically every book you can get your hands on.

What I realized about 2 years ago was that you can't expect to read one of those books and get the same results as the person who wrote them or as you say "a pale imitation of some guy I don't even know.” What has given me the best results is when I read these books I don’t try to imitate or duplicate. You and I are not Neil Strauss or any of these other “pick up artists”. We are completely different people and what works for them is not necessarily going to work for you or me.

I like to take things from each book and apply them to my own style. Forget the peacocking, canned pick up lines or hypnotize routines. Pay attention to the basic philosophies and principles that each author tries to convey in their work. This is why I read this website. It’s about philosophies, and fundamentals. Not a bunch of Neil Strauss exaggerated field reports. That is where you start. I took the ideas and principles that I agreed with the most and catered them to my personality and what works for me. Everyone has their own style, and their own personality. What works for you, me, or Chase is going to be different based on our personalities but we all can benefit from the basic building blocks or fundamentals.

It takes time before you start to figure out what really works for you. You might have to change things up a long the way but it is worth it once you figure it out. Keep getting out there and force yourself to talk to new women. I know how awful it is to be frozen in place. That approach anxiety will go away but it will be uncomfortable at first. The more you face that uncomfortable feeling the quicker it will turn to comfort. Great article Chase.

Brent

Housedejacques's picture

Hey Brent, thanks for answering my comment.
I recently finished The Game. It was not what I expected it to be. I'm in that post-reading period where I still don't have a solid opinion, but let's just say that I had a hard time finishing the book, due in large part to the insufferable second part.

In any case, what I got out of it was that: dealing with women is a learnable skill and that motivated, driven men can learn it. That's what struck me the most about Neil Strauss' character. He's got this enormous drive to absolutely be the best and manage to get there. I don't agree with the way he did it -all the Project Hollywood bullshit- but what I admire is him understanding the skill set and going out of his way to learn it. I think Chase would agree with this. I sincerely think that all the tension and stuff that comes from dealing with women can be broken down and controlled with the right frame of mind and, of course, experience. You just have to be willing to learn it.

All of Neil Strauss' routines and stuff basically got me to thinking that just about anything could be made into a routine. He's got his passions and his opinions, and he isn't afraid to show 'em to the world. He also has questions in his mind, and he asks people about it. Sure, he canned everything and made it all very robotic, but in the end he was actually getting to people by constructing material out of all the things he was passionate about.

He was also willing to sticking his neck out. That's what I found impressive: he'd walk up to people and straight up ask them, "What do think about this?" Sure, the routine was carefully designed to elicit a response, but that's not the point. The point is having the balls to approach and start interacting so transparently.

So that's what I got out of the book. Everybody can have his own little routines. But they don't have to be routines. You just have to be willing and fearless and speak about the things you're passionate about. You read some weird test on the internet about how to tell if a girl is gonna be a good mother? Run it on somebody, but only if you find it interesting.

So that's how I see it. There are no routines, only people willing to talk about what matters to them. Other than that, you just have to learn the fundamentals, and that's what Chase is here for.

Cheers.

Anonymous's picture

Hey chase,thank you for helping me make my life better.I have a question,I work for a major retailer stocking shelves all day,so I run into a huge amount of people including lots of attractive woman every day.my question is,any tips I could use to pick up woman at work?thanks again,man,and have fun.

E's picture

Hey Chase,
I've been reading your blog for a few weeks now and I think it's awesome! I have been trying to incorporate your techniques into meeting girls as much as I can, though I must say it is sometimes difficult for me to muster up the courage and just approach (I have my on and off moments). Anyway, I was curious as to what reasons a girl might have for not coming home with you when you ask them to (this way, I can figure out what to improve on). I will give you a quick example:

Went alone to a party on Saturday at my small college (that part was weird as I never go out alone) and saw some random girl dancing with a group of her friends. I know you say it is better to find a girl not dancing, but at my school, every party is just one big dance party, so there is no getting around it. Anyway, I walked right up to her and told her I thought she was cute and yada yada, she seemed interested, so I talked to her for a little and then asked her to dance with me. We ended up dancing and making out within about 2-3 minutes, then I cut it off to move her to the outside of the party so we could talk. We then hooked up a little on the outskirts of the party in between my "deep diving" conversation with her where I found out a good deal about her, all the while her legs were on me and we were making out. I then asked her about 5-10 minutes after if she would like to come back to my room and night cap it (we were talking about vodka just before), to which she briefly hesitated, then replied that she should get back to her friends, but it was nice meeting me and thanks for making her birthday more special (it was her birthday).

I apologize for the lengthy example but any help you could offer would be greatly appreciated!
Best,
E

Anonymous's picture

Hey Chase

I just want to know how do you close the deal with a girl? And how to do it in a way that would not be akward?

James's picture

Hello Chase,

One thing I'd really like to see after reading all your great articles here is a summary, or rather, a checklist that we who haven't yet internalized everything could use when interacting with girls, like a map. I was thinking of something along the lines of: 1) approach the girl, 2) "deep dive", 3) get her to do this, or to say this, etc. It would be a great help, and would clarify a lot, I think. Do think about it please, thanks.
J.

Taz's picture

Hey chase and anyone else viewing this.
I am in dire need of a dating/picup coach and am willing to pay for some sessions. I am tired of being friend zoned wich seems to happen with every girl i meet if anyone knows where i can go for this or is willing to train me for the right price please email me and let me know
kevinksalame@gmail.com

Gil's picture

Is there something to be said that "well duh" Alpha males are pro-social while Omega males may well have Asperger's Syndrome? For normal people 80% of communication is non-verbal - it's not what you say but how you say it that matters. The standard irritating thing people find with those who have AS is that they can't "take a joke" because they take what people say literally. For people with AS 95%+ of communication is verbal. To get a snapshot of what those with AS see is to read an email with text such "gee, you're smart" - you can't tell if it's a compliment or an insult as you can't put into context. It's little surprising that those with AS do poorly in relationships and careers - social skills seriously matter.

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