Book Review: The Rational Male by Rollo Tomassi | Girls Chase

Book Review: The Rational Male by Rollo Tomassi

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Varoon Rajah's picture

the rational male
A review of The Rational Male, a book focused at upending fem-centric thinking in men and teaching them to think like men again.

Rollo Tomassi’s book, The Rational Male, is an amalgamation of essays from content on his own website, The Rational Male, and other dating advice forums where he frequently contributes. I came across this book by chance on Amazon and found the content interesting enough to warrant a look.

This series of writings tunes men in to the dynamics of the human sexual marketplace through an exploration of human behavioral and evolutionary psychology, and demonstrates how such concepts show up culturally and politically. Tomassi’s intent is to educate the average man about his sexual potential, options, leverage, and strategies in his general relationship with women while exploring women’s sexual strategies, relationship strategies, and social conventions that we see commonplace today. Rollo summarizes this himself near the end of his book:

My intent with all this is to illustrate how the reality in which we find things ‘normal’ is rendered by fem-centric influence. Across ethnicities, and encompassing all manner of social diversity, this influence is so insaturated into our culture, laws, media, entertainment, from our collective social consciousness to our individual psyches that we simply take it for granted as the operative framework in which we live. I realize this is a tough pill to swallow, because male imperative does in fact intersect with female imperative depending on mutual goals. However, the point is that of operative framework, the reality we function in, is primarily defined by the feminine.

– p. 266

The now well-known men’s self improvement community, which includes the “manosphere,” consists of many trains of thought and communities devoted to understanding the masculine-feminine dynamic. Rollo’s background consists of what he terms a “rock-star” 20s that led to pursuing a university degree in behaviorism psychology at age 32. This, coupled with his intense life experience and his near decade use of forums as a testing ground for ideas on sexual dynamics and attracting women, led him to be a critical author in the manosphere and men’s rights community.

This book is based on many psychological concepts, and also ventures deep into the darker elements of the masculine-feminine dynamic and human sexuality. I caution readers toward its content and suggest reading with a curious mind. I consider Rollo’s book more appropriate for intermediates looking to advance their skill set to the next level in their relationship with women, as it is critical to develop healthy mindsets about women and sexuality in order to use that power responsibility.

Power is power, and we have a responsibility as men to use it ethically – as seen in the core philosophies of Girls Chase, we always practice from a mindset of love and adventure, never from one of hate, revenge, or negativity. However, for many men who find this community on their own, they see a world that bitterly challenges deeply rooted beliefs. From the book:

Game was a wondrous tool set of skills, but without the insight or foresight to deal with what these tools could build, it was potentially like giving children dynamite.

– p. 113

With that in mind, let’s explore.

Comments

Motiv's picture

Tomasi book review

I'm surprised there are no comments on this review. Maybe all the interested readers are still busy digesting the book. I bought the Audible version immediately and have listened through the entire book three times now.

My dad was very much like one of those beta providers, and I liken him to a bitter adolescent where women are concerned. It made me sick as a middle to high school kid hearing him exclaim now and then how mom would never "give him any [sex]." *vomit!* Should not a woman who truly loves/desires a man want to open her legs for him, eagerly?! Clearly, some men are fucking women successfully (putting smiles on their faces in the process), yet most, however, seem to be sexually undesirable.

The Red Pill came first to me as chilling shock (strong suicidal urges), yet was followed by a surging relief of freedom. I have a strong "shallow" side, and once the chilling shock subsided, I started to feel quite validated in my love for all things shallow: pea cocking, acting like movie characters, dressing to the hilt in sexy clothing (this one took a while to feel comfortable with), and finally reshaping my body with weightlifting. It all feels so good and liberating.

The only downside (and there always is) is keeping my fear in check that this "shallow" life is somehow a bad thing, particularly since I have only just barely scratched the surface. That is the true struggle in my option: the inner demons that would sabotage our discovery and fulfillment of living a life in the light of the truth have to be contained. I think of it as building a mental barrier around them (think Ghostbusters ghost containment machine) and reinforcing that barrier with healthy life habits: healthy eating, working out, getting enough sleep, and last but not least, spin those plates!! Having multiple missions as well as multiple women in the mix will both protect your ego while providing a healthy dose of reference points from which to grow your understanding.

Again, GREAT BOOK!

Cheers,
M

Author
Varoon Rajah's picture

Mischief,

Glad you enjoyed the read!

I find it amazing when I *still* meet couples who are not having sexual relationships - either in marriage or long before. I remember talking with a girlfriend about three months ago - her girl-friend rewarded her partner's birthday by "giving him sex," in her words. My girlfriend was shocked - she told her friend she'd never be with a man if sex wasn't part of the picture, yet the friend was perfectly content not sleeping with her own boyfriend unless he did something with her to earn it. That couple rarely slept with each other. Who knows what else was happening behind the scenes. Long story short - all women desire sex, but they give it willingly to only the strongest men, the ones that capture their attraction.

Exposure to the "red pill" - which should be redefined as just being presented an alternative world view, similar to how the movie The Matrix portrays it - is ultimately a very good thing, but everyone reacts to it in different ways. It's not easy for the mind to perceive and accept change, particularly when you've built an entire persona around a certain view and then someone comes along and challenges it. Current American politics and social-political culture is very much like this, on both sides.

Fear is commonly thought of as a bad thing, but there is a flip side - fear motivates, and fear can create action that creates positive results. One thing that has always helped me grow in life - whenever I feel fear, or experience something fearful, the best course of action is to step INTO the fear, rather than away from it.

This could be many things. Fear commitment? Get into a single LTR and make it last as long as possible. Fear approaching women in a night club? Get your ass to the nightclub and start approaching the hottest girls who scare you the most. Granted, your ego usually takes a hit, but with concentrated effort, a good mindset to learning, and feedback, we can become comfortable with those things that cause us fear and move to the next level. Over time as we get comfortable with what was previously fearful, we start to win and overcome the things we first feared. We thus learn that fear is manageable - it's not an end-all, be-all type of thing.

VR

Motiv's picture

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james 's picture

Good review, as per Mischief's comment I'm just digesting the book and it is blowing my mind

Author
Varoon Rajah's picture

Glad you liked it, James!

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