Congruence is a term in psychology that refers to a state where
your self and your behavior align. This leads to crazy success in
dating.
How many “techniques” have guys ever used to get women?
Some guys take a very smooth, suave approach – a little James Bond mixed with Danny Ocean.
Others take a “Van Wilder” approach and try to amp up a girl’s emotions, making her have so much fun that her logical, self-judging mind turns off, and sex just happens.
Others, me included, like to take a “gorilla game” approach, and just approach every girl as decisively and directly as possible, initiating physical contact as early as is appropriate.
Content
There are a ton of different strategies when it comes to getting girls, and those are just a few. But which one is the best? Some would argue the merits of push-pull game, others claim that providing a witty and charming conversation takes the cake, while others insist that confidence is key. What I would say is this: these are all very good approaches to getting women, and they all have their merits. Some strategies will work better than others – depending on the situation.
If you’re at that posh new nightclub in LA, or at Surrender in Las Vegas for your yearly bachelor’s trip, using “James Bond” game might not be the best idea. If you’re at a high-end business networking meeting, emulating “Van Wilder” might network your ass right to the curb. But regardless of the location and style of game you prefer, there is one underlying principle that is more important than ANY strategy or technique.
That principle, of course, is congruence.
Comments
Hi,
Hi,
very interesting article. I always took up the cudgels for "beeing yourself" but in the right was. I think you worked it out in a understanding way.
T
Thanks man :)
I think that a lot of "be yourself" advice needs to be rephrased as "be your best self" - glad to hear you enjoyed the article!
Hmm...
So that's what women mean when they say, "be yourself". Interesting read.
Sweet.
I find that you can enter congruence with enough mindfulness.
Sometimes when I'm sad, (I used before and my family used and we all have depressive personalities; this is hardcore I don't care if you're the girl of my dreams brooding) I just sit down at any fucking bench and soak in the minutes of existence that are gone forever... funny enough, the approach invitations are ridiculous! I get up and approach and they just walk away like I'm a phony. The only reason I approach is because I think I "should" at the time...
Next time I'll just give a small smile and wave :)
Thanks for the article.
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