Is She Too Hot? Well, Looks are Subjective | Girls Chase

Is She Too Hot? Well, Looks are Subjective

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Alek Rolstad's picture

looks are subjective
Before you think she’s too hot and out of your reach, consider this: “hot” for you isn’t necessarily “hot” for the next man. Beauty is subjective.

Today we will discuss briefly the latest theories on whether or not looks are subjective. We have so far discussed a lot about women’s looks and the difficulty of picking them up. The theories covered in those earlier posts concerning the correlation between looks and difficulty of pick-up are more or less based on the premise that looks are more or less objective.

We will challenge this notion a bit – and see how the subjective aspect of looks plays out on the level of difficulty:

  • Is our perception of someone else’s looks subjective?

  • If yes, will/can it affect the level of difficulty in picking her up?

  • Is there still some objectivity left in our perception of attractiveness?

These are questions I would like to discuss in this post. Now, before I move on, I just want to make it clear to the reader that I am not a natural scientist. There will be parts of this post that biologists and other natural scientists would be able to describe more scientifically. As I do not have a lot of knowledge concerning how our DNA affects how we perceive other people, I will avoid discussing it in the first place. In other words, I will leave out the “scientific aspect”, as I believe there are better online resources on biology outside of GirlsChase.com.

I will therefore focus more on my own experiences and observations over the course of nine years in the pick-up community. The article will focus more on the seduction aspect rather than the biological aspect. The end goal of this site is, after all, to make one a better seducer.

Comments

Chandler Bing's picture

Definitely, i always used to get jealous when my old roommate would say he made out w/ some girl or slept w/ a girl & then i'd see his girl & i wouldn't get jealous lol caz i didn't think she was that cute. I guess I just imagined that when he slept w/ a girl, he was sleeping or making out w/ the kind of girl that I wanted but his tastes of cute/hot differed.

Personally of those 6 pics, from 1-2-3 left to right top, & 4-5-6 left to right bottom, only girls 1 and 2 are cute to me. But neither would be my hottest girls. In my area, I could go out to the grocery store on a weekly basis & find cuter girls than those, which makes me think maybe i live in a better place for girls than I thought haha.

Then again, it's all subjective ;)

Shane Ramirez's picture

This article brings up a good point. I've been guilty of falling into the trap of wanting more socially hot girls. It would be great to meet more of them and see what it's like to date them, but I've gotten over the need to go after them. Nowadays I focus on types of girls I've always wanted to meet: fit blonde chick, exotic Latina, etc. I just went out with a Turkish girl I met on tinder. One of the most beautiful girls I've ever gone out with. I let my nerves get the best of me the second date, but luckily it was enough to bed her. She isn't down to meet again sadly but at least I pushed through the anxiety of it and can be cooler around my types of beautiful in the future.

Johnny Friskk's picture

Interesting article Alek.

I would like to share my story of how I met my LT girl and would like your opinion as well as Chase's if you guys have the time. My situation is very unique and contradicts much of what you write here on GirlsChase. Having said that, I found this website a few months ago and have learned a lot in terms of relationship management, sociology, and female/male psychology.

Approximately 4 years ago I flew to a city 500 miles away from mine to visit a friend for a week. During that time, and near the end of the trip, we went out with a group of his friends and that's when I met her. We hit it off amazingly: flirting, touching, laughing. It wasn't love at first sight per say... but as the night went on I fell head over heels and just could not bring myself to make a move out of pure nervousness.

It gets worse.

That night somehow we ended up sleeping in the same bed and I didn't do anything. In the morning we ended up cuddling but I still could not make a move out of utter fear. I felt like a total pussy.

Two days later, I flew back to my home town, the whole time thinking how stupid the entire situation was that I'd suddenly developed this little schoolboy crush on this girl that I'd just met! I said to myself repeatedly how ridiculous I was being and I deleted her number on the flight back.

A week went by, and I still could not stop thinking about her. Unfortunately for me, her number was etched into my brain as it was very easy to remember... so I picked up the phone and called her. She seemed quite surprised but not off-put. We chatted for about 30 minutes or so and when I hung up the phone I knew I had to have her. I became obsessed to a degree. However, given the logistics, I was not being totally foolish. I continued to see girls in my home town but I would make it a point to call her weekly. I would initiate our conversations 90 percent of the time. And I never told her my feelings. Personally, I thought once enough time had passed I would just get over her and we could be friends or something. I really had no idea what I was doing with this girl. Anyway after a couple months of talking I would push her a little bit to come and see me in my city. More and more as our conversations progressed.

Oh, and I forgot to mention, that she had gotten a boyfriend by this time. But I still didn't care. I was just so infatuated.

A few more months went by and she broke up with her boyfriend. Shortly after she took a bus to come and see me! Talk about investment! We had an absolute blast for the weekend, but no sex. Which totally makes sense to me now since I had clearly thrown myself deep into BF territory. The second time was much better and it finally happened. She came twice more after that before I made the trip to go and see her. Anyway it has been 3 years now that we have been in a relationship. Half of which was long distance before we moved in together. Obviously this sounds cliché, but she is the perfect girl: absolutely gorgeous (to me anyway), totally faithful, amazing homemaker (although I had to turn her into one), and I'm still very much attracted to her and her to me.

Anyway, I thought I would share my story, since I believe it is quite the exception rather than the rule. And given both of your guys copious amounts of experience I would like to get your view on things. How did this all fall into place despite all the rules I had broken (not moving fast enough (tortoise speed in fact), the distance, the provider role I slotted myself into, the amount of investment I put in beforehand, and many more).

I would also like to mention that at the time we were both in our early twenties.

Your input would be appreciated guys.

Best,

Johnny

Mr. Shark's picture

Hi,

To me, you saying it contradicts majority of stuff discussing here, seems like you believe stuff on this site is dogmatic. That you either move fast or the girl is lost forever and you cat get her. That is just my conclusion basen on your wording, something to think about. Because there are lots of things on this site that are situational or based only on experience in US. And guys here take it as true for every girl out there. One thing that comes to mind is that the girl gets hit on constantly. Or that she has high amount of orbiters. Assuming the girl you find as one of the most beautiful ones is being hit on 24/7 at her class, job, transition points like public transport or street and her facebook and instagram is just not faulty. You can never really know what her reality looks like until you meet her.

Use my comment as a brain worm, I am not saying this is how you really think about this stuff

Judith's picture

You're right, my friends have always made fun of me because I'm 25 yet only ever have relations with the rough- around -the- edges, older rugged shaved head lumberjacks aged over 33 b/c they're 100% my kind.I love having them in abundance out west. I'm repulsed (no offense) by my friends type they adore young baby faced pretty boys. Guys under 33 have never been my type that's why I hated living in NYC among other factors like its overpriced, the climate sucks and its a tiny overcrowded sewer slum & rodent sanctuary. I think the 2nd top row (blue eyed blonde) and the last on bottom row (blue eyed blonde) are beautiful, very E.E. looking which, were a guy they'd be my type.

Jimbo's picture

I don't know why they'd make fun of you. There are many reasonable explanations for these discrepancies. For one…

(a) There are different aspects of masculinity women are attracted to. (Same for men.) What you see as a mere pretty boy can be seen by your friends as a guy who's dominant in a certain field, as a confident social butterfly golden boy, as the rebellish artsy guy, or a relentlessly goal-oriented snake who always gets what he wants. Those are all different expressions of masculinity. It’s just that your favorite one happens to be brawn and physical ruggedness.

(b) It's also normal because most women want a man who is more physically rugged or at least bigger than they are. And that's where age comes into play. I've always dated younger girls because I've found it easier to get them to submit and be impressed—the seniority and greater life experiences and social skills alone add to the impressiveness, right from when I was in college and dated high school girls to today wanting to marry a markedly younger woman than I am (I wrote about that in more detail in a comment under the "madonna/whore" article). And I don't know why in the West we've come to see this is as weird or creepy, as if the guy is taking advantage of the girl somehow—he’s not, the girl likes it and you’re the living example of it.

(c) It also depends on the woman herself. A six-footer will usually only be attracted to guys over 6’, though not only of course. Likewise, a more “rugged” or masculine woman will want one who is more so than herself. That’s why very few black women are into white men and vice-versa—it’s because for most black women, white guys are too fair-skinned for them, less aggressive, and just overall weaker, whereas most white girls tend to find white guys just fine and some find black guys a little too much. Women with a strong character also want a guy whose character is even stronger.

(d) Birth control. Women on the pill tend to go for less masculine men than those off it. See that “what’s the best way to pick up girls” article. That also might explain the differences between you and your friends.

Btw how many 30something lumberjacks with shaved heads are there in the west heh? Aside from around 10 months of trips away, I've lived in NV my whole life (26 years) and I’ve yet to see one. Though I have seen quite a few ranchers who are close to that type.

Judith's picture

Hahaha, Jimbo,
I travel back & forth mainly between Baja & SoCal, but have lots of friends I visit up in NorCal, Oregon, Washington state & Western Canada let me tell you there is a surplus of the men I described so creatively (: .Also I'm Belarusian and I travel frequently to Russia and Guam though I don't have much friends there, but i still find plenty of men that have shaved/close cropped heads and the overall appearance that lures me. Its also of course a personality attribute I find I love about the humble, laidback, masculine lumberjacks :) Ranchers are up there for me ;) Love them!! Even though I do live really close to Vegas and have one amazing friend who lives there I dont visit Nevada all that much b/c she comes to visit me plus I avoid Sin city since, I like gambling and its the gambling capital of the world. And may I ask what are you the surfer or tattooed type? Vegas & L.A. are full of the both (even if NV is desert lol), but much of the SoCal outskirts are filled with the 1950's wild west guys and I dont have to search to hard to hook one.

Jimbo's picture

For some reason, I can't see your message here, but I got it in my email.

I think I took the "lumberjack" part too literally --as in 'their profession'-- whereas what you meant is just "lumberjack-type" or "lumberjack-looking". Haven't seen much of the formers, have seen quite a few of the latters.

Me... I'm more the "goes to the desert in a convertible with his bros to drink, smoke, listen to music, and and see who can shoot the most lizards" type of guy. I've only taken my girlfriends there three times so far even though I've been there like thirty times. I often attract and end up with the meek malleable types and those tend to find the whole desert thing at night with the lizards murky and end up having cold feet about, so they rarely come. But it's the opposite, it's one of the most beautiful experiences one can have, especially on moonful nights. You know, each one of us has one of those moments that remain engraved in your head with all the concomitant feelings, and mine are pulling over right in the middle of the rocky desert full of history-loaded holes with only the sound of burning cigar leaves, this song, and and gunshots cutting through the stunned silence of that place and time along with someone I like. I wouldn't trade those moments for half a million bucks (though for a million I would), or for shagging the hottest thing since fire--yes, the US 50 is my ultimate love. So yeah, I guess in short you could call me the desert type.

Now as to what the typical lizard-shooting desert-type looks like: spikey hair, sunglasses, rather strong build, cross chain, sideburns, fitted dark shirt/t-shirt, dark jeans, black shoes, one left-arm tattoo, occasional stubble. Here he was two years ago.

As to you, you sound like the hyper type of girl, most likely bisexual... I'm right, aren't I? (smirk)

Judith's picture

LMAO, how'd you guess! I'm complicated, Independent, arrogant,liberal, loyal, commitment phobic, but genuine & professional to the core. I have an occupation that requires me to travel extensively where I put my math & physics expertise and education to use, yet I have tattoos and I'm a rebel. A contradiction courtesy of being an Aquarius amongst other environmental factors in life, but I can proudly say I'm a quality lady ;) especially, coming from the upbringing I was dealt with. My attributes outnumber my burdens. Btw, great song.

Jimbo's picture

You're not as complicated as you think you are. I guessed right because I've known your kind all too well. It has more to do with high T than with being Aquarius.

I'll add that half the stuff on Chase is useless when it comes to getting it on with you as you're pretty matter-of-fact when it comes to hooking up ("You're a hot piece of hunk, I'm kinda horny, let's get it on.") You also have a lot of insecurities. And you'll want to settle down and have children at age 32-33.

In the meantime, you'd fare well in my beloved desert. Though I'd definitely kick your ass when it comes to shooting lizards. ;)

Franco Lombardi's picture

Good post, Alek!

I've already seen several comments above do this, but for the sake of the point being made in this post, why don't we do a little test? =)

For those of you that see my comment and are interested in participating, please reply to my comment and rank the six girls in the picture above. I will go ahead and rank them right now myself:

5, 6, 4, 2, 1, 3

(1-3 is top left to top right, 4-6 is bottom left to bottom right)

I bet we'll see quite variance! (NOTE: None of these girls are 100% "my" type and give me that "gut" feeling, but I can still rank them in terms of my personal preference)

- Franco

Thedoctor's picture

Franco / Alek,

I'm fascinated with the idea of this little experiment. Here are my rankings:

2, 6, 1, 4, 5, 3

What I gather from this is that you, Franco, have terrible taste for the most part. ;)

-John

Michal's picture

2, 6, 5, 1, 3, 4 - although only the 2 resembles the type I like, I would put 6, 5 and 1 on the same level because I see certain... irregularities that make them less good looking for me, however 3 has weird haircut and as a type is very far from my type. And 4 has really bad ratios in her face for some reason. Seems very squeezed for my taste and her eyebrows seem to be too close to her eyes.

Author
Alek Rolstad's picture

hi guys. Here is my ranking..

4, 6, 5, 1, 3, 2

None are actually truly my type either. I did not pick the image :)

-Alek

Jimbo's picture

If it's strictly for a fuke: 3 4 2 6 5 1

If it's for a relationship (which to me is mainly to have children within): 2 6 4 3 1 5

(1: top left -- 6: bottom right)

For the former, I'll care mostly about sheer hotness then about beauty; for the latter, hotness and beauty are still there, but I also add into account the desirable traits I want to pass on my to my progeny, and motherliness.

1984's picture

"I've already seen several comments above do this, but for the sake of the point being made in this post, why don't we do a little test? =)

For those of you that see my comment and are interested in participating, please reply to my comment and rank the six girls in the picture above. I will go ahead and rank them right now myself:

5, 6, 4, 2, 1, 3

(1-3 is top left to top right, 4-6 is bottom left to bottom right)"

 

 

Super late to the party, but here's my ranking.

6,2,5,1,4,3

6 seems to rank consistently high among the commenters here =) Sauce? anyone knows her name?

Girl 1. (chinese girl, top left hand corner) is Liu Yifei. Though, Fan bing bing or Angelababy is much more beautiful, as a representative of chinese girls. (just my opinion LOL)

This is a fun activity. Every regular reader should post their preferences here so that we can see the variance!

Vanilla Ice's picture

6 = BEST (bottom row, far right)

3 = WORST (top row, far right)

The others are meh.

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