Socializing

When I first discovered dating advice for men on the Internet in the mid-2000s, I was ecstatic; here were exactly the tools I was looking for to take what I was trying to do and put it on rocket fuel.

With these tools, I knew, I could shave years off my learning curve and advance at a far faster rate than I could having to figure every single thing out by myself, on my own.

It didn't take long though before I realized that many of the guys posting on seduction forums and meeting up in pickup lairs were "quirky"; there were things about them that were off, and the kinds of women they were going for were... not the kinds of women I was all that interested in.

I maintained friendships with the cooler and more "normal" guys I met through PUA - and indeed, many of these guys are still good friends of mine today, and are some of the sharpest and most improvement-oriented people I know (many are also quite successful in their businesses and careers nowadays) - but aside from them, I largely retreated to friendships with "naturals" - guys who were naturally good with women, and hadn't studied pickup and had only the most cursory knowledge of what it taught.

What I noticed was that there were some very distinct differences between the guys who were naturally good with women and the guys who were not - and while some of this went away as guys improved, some of it didn't; these differences remained.

And those differences very often meant the difference between being cool and getting the more attractive, harder-to-get girls, and not being and getting those.

The bro code; man code; man law. These tenets go by many names, but the fact is: every man should have a code.

A code that not only applies to the way in which he conducts himself, but also in which he interacts with his fellow men. Since there could be dozens of possible rules in the entire bro code, I've narrowed it down to 11 key tenets that apply to seduction.

This set of rules is not written in stone (yet), but I think it's a good set of guidelines to ensure maximum cohesion among men, and maximum satisfaction within the individual.

So here they are…

It’s the one word that usually means you’re going to have a great night. It’s the word that’s synonymous with new women, new social opportunities, and maybe a hangover the next morning… party.

But have you ever found yourself getting really amped up for a party, only to end up alone, drunk, and disappointedly chatting with your boys about that “hot girl” you definitely should’ve hooked up with?

We’ve all been there. But today I want to rid you of that frustration. I want to give you the roadmap to successfully having sex with girls at parties, and waking up with a smile on your face (hopefully). And I’m going to show you that it’s really not that hard.

Let’s get to it…

Note from Chase: Drexel Scott is joining our site as a longtime NLP practitioner and very experienced ladies' man. His approaches to women and psychology are intuitive and often quite insightful - I first really got to get to know him on introduction from Alek. I think and hope you'll enjoy reading his stuff, as he brings yet another flavor to the Girls Chase canon. Here's Drexel's first article with us, on the basics of NLP.

Neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) is a communication technique that taps into the inner workings of the mind, allowing for the drawing out of emotions, the seeding of ideas, and the tipping of the scales ever so slightly in the direction you want them to go in any one-on-one (or sometimes more) social interaction you choose to employ it in. While the more advanced areas of NLP require a good bit of training and understanding to execute successfully, some of the more beginner-level aspects of it are very useful for even the casual dabbler in giving himself a social edge.

It has been said that, if NLP could be taught in a five-minute seminar, it would contain three simple slides. Those three slides would be:

1. Outcome
2. Acuity
3. Flexibility

This simple organization is the skeleton for NLP’s basic method of setting and attaining goals. Of course, it is more complicated than that, and I’ll explain each of the three terms at considerable length in just a moment. As with all skills you learn, develop, or build, your require a solid foundation on which everything else can rest.

In NLP, that foundation is made up of those three principles mentioned above, and expanded upon below.

In the recent article on being happy while leading an unconventional life, a reader asked the following questions about remaining motivated as you become more skilled with women:

“Hey chase!
super article. Especially the point about keeping your mouth shut. One you know about but always need a reminder. Very very important if you want to be a maverick ;). But theres a point i would like your opinion on. It struck to me when read about the cybersatiation part. You have stressed again again the importance of sleeping with girls to get better with them . But what is also important is the hunger to sleep with them. Most of the guys like me are satiated with the responses that girls give . As in there are always 5 or 7 girls in my life which bounce around me and love my company to the extent they would sleep with me. But this creates a feel good factor of temporary satiation which kills my intent at the moment when physical escalation is needed. ( though i fret about it later and am all disappointed.) an article about keeping your intent at the moment so much so that the inner hunger that drives the game would be pretty interesting. What is that goes in the mind of a true seducer at the time of going for the kill? is he lusting over the night to come or is he still not overwhelmed by the situation? my question is because we always here every guy good with girls saying ' oh it just happened i didnt do anything ' the girl just came and fell on my johnson!!:D)”

It's really a two-part question.

In the first part, our reader here, in talking about "cybersatiation", is referring to the part in that article where I talked about the fact that because I'm not on social media, women are unable to slake their curiosity about me by crawling my profiles on these sites, and have to meet up with me in person again - often ending up in my bed - if they want to know more about me... and they usually do.

As you improve with women, you will begin to reach a phase where those women begin to emotionally validate you - they start to tell you you're sexy, to compliment you, to chase after you, and it feels so good that you lose your motivation to actually take them to bed. "That girl is mine if I want her," you tell yourself... except, she isn't yours, and you didn't get her. But how do you avoid this apathy and self-satisfaction setting in, rotting away at your ambition?

The other part was a question about what you're thinking about once you're already quite good with women and you're going through a seduction. How does your brain work in this case?

You know those people who can just walk into a room and instantly become best friends with everyone? It seems like they have some secret quality that makes them charming, magnetic, and completely approachable.

Have you ever wanted to be one of those people? Chances are you have. And I bet you still do.

But I’ll let you in on a little secret: it’s much, much easier than it seems to learn how to connect with people – to anyone and nearly everyone – anywhere, anytime, anyplace.

Today I’m going to show you a few simple steps to transform the way you interact with others, and master connecting with people.

Going to take a dip into a moral gray area today, but will talk a bit about "karma" as I do so, too. And not the spiritual sort - that's neither here nor there, as far as I'm concerned. I'm far more interested in the practical variety.

Anyway, we've had some discussion lately about snagging girls from directly under their boyfriends' noses - one of our forum members who's been racking up a number of new girls in bed lately, NarrowJ, shared a recent report about taking a girl to bed in the house she stayed in with her (rather controlling and abusive) boyfriend, and a reader named Aaron recently wrote in with this question:

“Hi Chase and friends at girlschase,

I was thinking an article on how to deal with the boyfriend himself in social situations would be great for an article, and would build on the shoulders of Chase's earlier article: "Girl Has a Boyfriend? 3 Things to Do, and 7 Things NOT to."

Imagine the following scenario: You know this girl from work or school. You like her. She likes you. You flirt with each other. The only problem? She has a long term boyfriend. Or alternatively, you meet a girl who has brought her boyfriend with her at a party.

Either way, a social situation arises in which she presents her boyfriend to you (for example at a party to test you, or out pure coincidence).

How do you handle the boyfriend? How do you demonstrate that you are a more dominant, superior, better man, and that she would be better off with you?

Hope you consider this!

Aaron"”

Is this possible to do? Sure. Is it something you can consistently pull off? ... well, let's just say take whatever your normal consistency is at picking up, and reduce that a fair bit because now you're trying to outcompete the girl's boyfriend; however, if you can pull this off with a girl who wants you to steal her from her man (we'll talk about these girls and why they want this in a bit), in this case you can actually achieve a higher degree of consistency at pulling... assuming you handle logistics properly.

But before we discuss doing this, let's talk a little about the scenario itself, and any potential moral implications... because I don't get my kicks making good people sob, and I hope you don't either.