Social Commentary

Is She Too Hot? Well, Looks are Subjective

looks are subjective
Before you think she’s too hot and out of your reach, consider this: “hot” for you isn’t necessarily “hot” for the next man. Beauty is subjective.

Today we will discuss briefly the latest theories on whether or not looks are subjective. We have so far discussed a lot about women’s looks and the difficulty of picking them up. The theories covered in those earlier posts concerning the correlation between looks and difficulty of pick-up are more or less based on the premise that looks are more or less objective.

We will challenge this notion a bit – and see how the subjective aspect of looks plays out on the level of difficulty:

  • Is our perception of someone else’s looks subjective?

  • If yes, will/can it affect the level of difficulty in picking her up?

  • Is there still some objectivity left in our perception of attractiveness?

These are questions I would like to discuss in this post. Now, before I move on, I just want to make it clear to the reader that I am not a natural scientist. There will be parts of this post that biologists and other natural scientists would be able to describe more scientifically. As I do not have a lot of knowledge concerning how our DNA affects how we perceive other people, I will avoid discussing it in the first place. In other words, I will leave out the “scientific aspect”, as I believe there are better online resources on biology outside of GirlsChase.com.

I will therefore focus more on my own experiences and observations over the course of nine years in the pick-up community. The article will focus more on the seduction aspect rather than the biological aspect. The end goal of this site is, after all, to make one a better seducer.

Is It Ever Okay to Date a Feminist?

date a feminist
Feminism has fast become a dominant ideology. When so many of the girls you meet have feminist leanings, should you ever actually date a feminist?

One of the more unusual phenomena we see in the West right now is that in many cases, men and women operate under divergent belief systems.

It’s quite odd, when you think about it. Most places, at most points in history, men and women operate under the same belief system, and agree on the same tenets. Usually that belief system is a religion, like Christianity, Judaism, Islam, Buddhism, Hinduism, or Shinto.

But in the absence of religion, other causes come to fill this space by inspiring a new form of religious belief or fervor. Any time something has an -ism attached to its name, it stands a reasonable chance of coming to occupy religious-level importance to people.

One such example is feminism.

Feminism has reached a degree in the West where non-believers are immediately ‘othered’ by the more hardcore adherents of the philosophy. It has its own truths, like the wage-gap and ‘rape culture’, that are immune to facts and statistics and have moved beyond scientific falsifiability. And it engenders a particularly combative relationship between the sexes.

The purpose of this site is not to either support or combat feminism; feminism comes and goes through history, and is a perpetual feature of advanced, wealthy, safe societies. The purpose of this site is to give you useful tools to make better life decisions.

And the one we’ll talk about today is this: should you ever date a girl who subscribes to feminism... or any other -ism diametrically opposed to your own beliefs?

The Unicorn Hunter

unicorn hunter
Perfect 10s, unicorns, what have you – do they even exist? In particular, we look at American girls, and if you can still find a good one.

There’s a special kind of girl out there.

This kind of girl is perfect.

During the Pick Up Artist Era, she was known as the Perfect 10.

Debates raged across the PUA world as to whether ‘perfect 10s’ even really existed. Did they? Some men claimed 10s walked the Earth and were attainable. Other men claimed there were no such things as 10s. 7s, 8s, 9s, okay. But 10s? Perish the thought.

Now, in the Manosphere Era, they call such a girl the Unicorn.

In the Manosphere, now, we see the same debate rage as previously raged among the PUAs: do unicorns exist? Are they obtainable? Or are they but a figment of man’s imagination: the ideal woman, dreamed up yet unrealized? The female human analogue to Plato’s perfect forms, perhaps.

To answer this question of whether these ‘unicorns’ exist and whether they are obtainable, though, first we need to figure out exactly how we’re defining them, and agree on a definition... Because every man defines these ‘perfect girls’ a little bit different.

And before we do that, we should talk about why we’re even talking about unicorns in the first place.

3 Theories on a Girl’s Hotness vs. How Hard She is to Get

hot hard to get
Hot girls are the hardest to get. Or is it average-looking girls who are, paradoxically, the hardest? 3 theories dig in and explain.

Previously we challenged the notion that hot girls are always harder to get, and that the hotter they are the harder it is to date and sleep with them. To do this, we looked at six (6) different variables aside from beauty that have an impact on how difficult it is to pick her up. Those were:

  1. A girl’s personality
  2. Her mood
  3. Her sociocultural background
  4. Her social circle
  5. Where and how you meet her
  6. And her self-awareness of her looks

You can read more about these variables in my previous post. If this is the first time you’re encountering them, you will find they shed a new light on the common misconception that “hotter = harder”.

Today we will delve deeper into what makes a girl more or less difficult to date and bed. This post is all about seduction theory. We’ll have a look at different theories on how looks alone affect a girl’s level of difficulty. Thus, the main focus of this post will be on the “look variable”.

The theories covered in this post might seem contradictive to some. One theory we dissect will be on why hot women are harder to get. Another theory we’ll look at today rests on the claim that average women are harder to pick up than more attractive ones.

My opinion on such theories is that they are all more or less correct and do not contradict each other – they just explain two different phenomenon.

A Few Thoughts on MGTOW: Men Going Their Own Ways

MGTOW
What is the MGTOW movement all about? Do MGTOWs reject women, love, sex, and society? Or is the phenomenon about something else...?

On my article “Quit Letting Girls Off the Hook So Much”, Jimbo asks for my take on the MGTOW movement:

That whole MGTOW movement. It seems to have gained steam lately. Their two main talking points are: – Women want to spend their prime years screwing around bad boys and then when they become less desirable they want to settle down with a good man to provide for them. So screw it, I’m not gonna be neither! – Marriage is a trap wherein in a woman grabs her man by the nuts because of all the divorce laws that favor her hugely nowadays and also because of her greedy nature. So screw it, no marriage from this guy!

Yeah, the whole MGTOW thing is an interesting phenomenon.

I’ve clashed with MGTOWs on occasion when they get into the whole ‘rah rah join our cause’ routine... I’m not really the club-joining sort.

But the rah rah MGTOWs aren’t necessarily representative of the movement overall. So what I’d like to do today is take a look at the ‘men going their own way’ movement and share some thoughts on it from a somewhat broader perspective.

How Dominant Men Approach Business, Pleasure, and Life

dominant men
A dominant man is one who wins. He’s one who holds sway over his dominion. And he does it with his aims, responsibility, interdependence, and victory.

In my article on having girls come join you, a commenter named Max asks the following:

Hey,

This is a totally off topic question, but in all articles regarding, being powerful, dominant and sexy, I could only pick out physical attributes such as slower body movements etc. Can you just describe his attitude and how he look at life, and how can I become one too, through day to day activities. Thanks!

This is a fun question for me. I rank dominance of his own life and sphere as a quality at the apogee of man’s cultivation. The man who holds true dominion over his endeavors is the closest man can ever get to absolute freedom. Combine this dominance with a clear moral character and you have a man who not only gets what he wants, but attracts, inspires, and leads, as well.

How you come to possess this attitude of striving toward dominion, and the kind of clarity and magnetism that surround it and intertwine with it, is what we’ll talk about today.

Are All Women Slaves to Hypergamy?

hypergamy
Hypergamy is her tendency to date or marry ‘up’. She wants the best, richest, highest status guy she can get, they say. But science disagrees.

One of the memes of the manosphere is that the women of Western society are ardently in pursuit of the wealthiest, highest status man they can get. The qualities women are said to prize most of all include:

  • Wealth
  • Status
  • Looks
  • Fame
  • Other forms of power

Manosphere pundits call this phenomenon ‘hypergamy’.

‘Hypergamy’ originally described the practice of marriage into a higher social or economic class by women. The manosphere has expanded that definition to describe women’s desire for and tendency to pursue men who are their ‘betters’ in some way or another for hook ups and relationships, as well as marriage.

I’m not a fan of the manosphere alpha-beta redefinition, but I have no qualms with its expanded definition of hypergamy. Seems like a natural fit for the term, especially in our present sexual/romantic environment.

So, let’s discuss.

Is hypergamy bad for you?

How big are its effects?

And, how must you adapt?

How to Survive in a Time of Moral Panic

moral panic
In a moral panic, no one is safe. Neighbors turn on neighbors, and opportunists use the panic to advance their careers. To survive the hysteria, you must be smart.

Last week I wrote an article titled “When Does ‘No’ Actually Mean ‘No’?” to help you stay smart and safe without having to hole up in a bunker and outwait an age of ambiguity and fear around sex. Today, I want to talk about survival during a general moral panic.

You may have come of age during the ‘rape culture’ witch-hunt. So this might be your first such experience with moral panic. Yet hysterias like this are a fixture of civilization.

A moral panic is a big fear that snakes through society, egged on by crusaders and amplified by the media. In a moral panic, an opportunistic minority become inquisitors in a grab for power. Meanwhile the rest of the population hunkers down and tries to wait out the storm. The few who try to fight back early on are often crushed.

Moral panics turn neighbor against neighbor. They do this by encouraging one man to condemn another for his own protection. If you accuse your neighbor of being a witch, surely you must not be one yourself.

So how do you survive a moral panic? Are you forced to keep your head down and hope no one fingers you as a boogeyman? Should you join the mob and gang up on others until the whole thing blows over, then pretend it never happened?

As I’ll lay out, these are the last things you want to do... Because they leave you defenseless against any accusations leveled against you.

Instead, you must seek to actively define yourself. You must make your identity so clear that the idea of accusing you seems not only pointless, but foolish.

When Does ‘No’ Actually Mean ‘No’?

no means no
When does no mean no? As the lines of consent increasingly blur, today’s men find themselves caught in a sexual Catch-22.


You’re somewhere private with a girl... kissing, caressing, running hands on one another’s bodies. And then you go to lift her shirt up.

“No,” she says.

It’s not a firm ‘no’. It’s more of an “I’m not quite ready” no. Or so you think.

But... Well, you might be wrong. You’re not quite sure.

You don’t want to be that guy who pushes her too far and makes her do something she doesn’t want to.

She isn’t a child, of course. She’s an adult like you. She has agency; her choices are hers.

Yet you want to be a force for good... not regret.

On top of this, you’re terrified of a girl crying rape... You realize 43,000 men have false allegations of rape made against them in the U.S. every year. Most of those cases get thrown out, but often only after tens of thousands in legal fees.

It’s the Salem witch-hunt of the 2010s. And you do not want to be the accused yelling “More weight.” You don’t want your life cindered for nothing.

Yet sex resistance is part and parcel to sex with American girls. If you have intercourse in America, you will encounter this. It is what girls from here do.

So what exactly should you do? And when does ‘no’ actually mean ‘no’?

Book Review: Why Him? Why Her? by Helen Fisher

Note from Chase: this is the first article by Varoon Rajah, who runs our podcast series. Varoon’s launching this book review series, where he aims to review a new book each month related to dating, attraction, relationships, or psychology. Here’s Varoon...


Why Him? Why Her? is a book by Helen Fisher which ultimately suggests who you fall in love with (for GC readers – who men and women are attracted to) is powerfully influenced by who you are. Or, in other words, your personality is influenced from a very young age by your inherent temperament in addition to developed character traits. While it is commonly thought that your experiences in life shape who you are, what is not as clear to many is how a person’s inherent biology ultimately shapes them, as well as guides their choices and decisions well through their life – including the domain of relationships, love, and romance.

why him why her

Helen briefly discusses this distinction – personality based on experiences and character versus personality based on biology and temperament – early on in her book:

Your character traits stem from you experiences. Your childhood games; your parents’ interests and values; how people in your community express love and hate; what relatives and friends regard as polite, dangerous or exciting; how they worship; what they sing; when they laugh; what they do to make a living and relax – these and innumerable other cultural forces combine to build your unique set of character traits.

The balance of your personality is your temperament, all of the biological based tendencies you have inherited, traits that emerge early childhood to produce your consistent patterns of feeling, thinking and behaving… Temperament is the “I am,” the foundation of who you are. Curiosity; creativity; novelty seeking; compassion; cautiousness; competitiveness: to some degree, you inherit these and many other aspects of your disposition.

Fisher, Helen. (2009). Why Him? Why Her?: finding real love by understanding your personality type (pp. 3-4). New York, NY: Henry Holt and Company, LLC.

And thus, we all have an inherent disposition and behavior that shows up to others. You might imagine where and how this is useful with your woman life – knowing the nature of that cute girl you’re about to approach or just approached, that cute girl you just met at 2 AM in a nightclub, that cute girl you’re about to go on a date with, and maybe even that cute girl you’re already dating or in a long term relationship with – has absolutely massive implications as to how you show up to her, how she shows up to you, and how elements that you present to each other serve or don’t serve to bring you two into getting together.

And knowing this – knowing your target and who she is – can enable the seeking of girls most suitable to partner with you, as well as cater your own experience with her to manage her needs, attractions, and repulsions.

And with that, we dive into this exploration of where experience meets biology.