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Meeting and attracting members of the opposite sex.

How to Demand Respect, Pt 5: Show Auto-Rejection to Make Her Chase

Hector Castillo's picture

show auto-rejection
Advanced disrespect-handling tech: if she goes too far, show your displeasure – and get her to chase after you to make it right.

Welcome back to Part 5 of this series.

If you have not read them yet, read Parts 1 through 4 here:

Onto the topic of Part 5: using auto-rejection to make girls chase you.

Hopefully, you don’t get to this point.

It’s much better if, after reading the previous articles in this series, you stomp out disrespectful behavior before it gets big enough that you have to auto-reject.

The best way to get out of a choke hold is to not get caught in one.

But sometimes, shit happens, and you end up in a choke hold.

The New Spot Bonus: Novelty in Your Meet Markets

Chase Amante's picture

meet market
When you first go somewhere new, it can seem like the best meet market you’ve found. Cute girls everywhere. But is this effect real or illusion?

Remember when you first moved to town? Beautiful girls everywhere. Your new location was a visual feast: women with great bodies in sexy clothes. Gorgeous faces and stunning hair. So much choice with women you didn’t know which girl to pick.

Or remember when you found that venue you’ve been to so many times now? That bar or nightclub you’ve been to 20 times. That shopping street or mall you visit every weekend. Remember how it was when you first went – how much your head spun as girl after hot girl walked by?

Compare that to today. There aren’t nearly as many beautiful girls. The women in your town seem to have grown older, heavier, and less cute. Those venues you frequent have dropped off in quality and beautiful girls are no longer in the abundance they once were.

Then, one day, you visit somewhere new.

It might be a new city, town, or suburb. It might be a new venue in your own area you haven’t visited before.

And when you get there, you’re amazed. There are beautiful girls everywhere! Your head spins as girl after hot girl walks by.

You’ve found a new favorite place – your new girl mecca.

But have you really? Or are you merely subject to the ‘new spot bonus’?

Nightlife Shadowing, Pt 1: When to Melt into the Crowd

Alek Rolstad's picture

shadowing
Sometimes in nightlife it’s best if you can “shadow”: just melt into the crowd and disappear. In this article, we talk when and why to do this.

Today I want to share an old concept of mine that I originally shared back in 2009, I think. I haven’t really revisited the concept since then, but lately I have found situations where the concept has proven to be extremely useful to me, and these situations are not uncommon. Based on this, I thought you all might find the concept of “shadowing” to be very useful. It is easy to understand and not difficult to apply, so this post is for everyone.

What is shadowing?

In basic terms, it’s the “anti-social proof,” but it’s not something that will ruin your social proof. It just works differently.

I have covered the concept of social proof (and preselection, which is the result of social proof) multiple times. Social proof is the tool that makes women preselect you (i.e., choose you before you even approach). Attraction can be generated as a result of women seeing you with other women.

  • The more women you are seen with, the greater the effect of social proof, and the more you get preselected

  • The hotter the women who provide you social proof, the greater the effect

  • The more into you those women appear to be, the greater the effect

Check out some of our posts on the subject if you want to learn more about it.

In order to get social proof, the following is required:

  • You must trigger attention

  • Be positioned where people will see you

  • Be a social butterfly

Shadowing, on the other hand, is the opposite. In other words, it is a tool to avoid attention; you become a shadow rather than a social butterfly.

I feel some of you may be skeptical already. “Why the hell would you do this?” is probably a question on a lot of your minds. Isn’t getting attention necessary to trigger approach invitations from women? Isn’t it good to be seen with other girls? Yes, those are all really good things – but not always.

I consider it my duty, therefore, to elaborate on why and when this technique can be useful before I get to the “hows” of becoming a shadow. Therefore, the practical part will be covered next week in Part 2.

As for now, let’s cover the theory behind shadowing.

How Women's Tastes in Men Change as They Age

Chase Amante's picture

women's tastes in men
As a woman ages, her tastes in men change. What does an under-21 girl prefer that women 32+ do not? Read on and find out.

As a man, your taste in women may or may not have changed as you’ve aged. I know a few guys whose tastes have changed over the years. Though I know many more guys whose tastes haven’t. I can tell you the only difference between the women I’m drawn to now and those I was drawn to 10 years ago is the girls I’m drawn to now are usually cuter. That is more simply a factor of having more choice with women now than I had when I was young, overweight, and romantically unskilled.

Women’s tastes in men, on the other hand, go through some major evolutions as they age. From between a girl’s late teens to her mid-30s, she shifts her tastes often dramatically.

Talk to most single women in their 30s about younger women and you’ll hear such women pan younger women’s standards in men. “Young women have the worst taste in men,” they’ll tell you. “The guys they go for are assholes with attitude. They have no taste.”

Male pundits normally regard this as a way for an older woman to make herself look more valuable in the dating market (i.e., she is more ‘refined’ than ignorant younger women) in order to make up for some of the lost value of her faded youth. And this “younger women are silly and foolish” frame does help older women do that. But there is a deeper reason so many single women in their 30s feel this way about those younger versions of themselves on the dating scene.

Before we talk about that though, we’ll talk about the different sorts of men women at different ages are most drawn toward. As always, game and fundamentals play a huge role here – the better yours are, the less you need to worry about fitting a certain template, and the better you’ll do even within that template.

Note that the age ranges we’ll discuss below are generalities. Some women may be more or less ‘mature’ than their ages (we’ll talk about that a bit below too). But in general, for the majority of women, you should find these age ranges fairly accurate.

Always Plan for a Woman to Change

Chase Amante's picture

woman changes
A woman can be fickle and changeable. But why is this so? Science shows us this fickleness is an inherent aspect of female decision making.

Hit and Run Social Proof for Girls You Meet at Bars

Alek Rolstad's picture

hit and run social proof
If you’re already in a chat with girls, it’s easy to both excite those girls and set up backup plan girls… by stepping away for a second to meet someone else.

I’ve got some more great pickup tech for you guys. Hopefully by the end of this year, you will have a huge arsenal. This post is primarily related to social proof, which we have covered a lot here in September and October. And you may be asking, “Alek, why didn’t you just share this technique while covering those other aspects of social proof?”

I have only one answer to that: Well, I just discovered this technique.

Yes, I am going out every weekend – and sometimes weekdays. I am out there meeting girls, banging girls, and discovering new strategies, techniques, and tactics all the time. This means I am sometimes sharing my techniques as I discover them. And in case you’re wondering, I give them 3-5 field tests before sharing in order to secure their validity and also get to observe their nuances. I believe techniques are best served fresh. I hope you are enjoying it.

Either way, let’s get on with it. Note that this technique is made primarily for night game (bars, clubs, house parties, etc.).

Tactics Tuesdays: Dealing with Core Tests on Dates and in Pickups

Chase Amante's picture

core tests dates
Not all tests are subtle. Sometimes women break out the big guns. But what do you do when she hits you with a test aimed right at your core?

In today’s Tactics Tuesdays post, we talk about a very specific kind of test. These are what I call ‘core tests’; they test a man at his core, aimed at what a woman dubs likely to be a core issue to a man’s strength or identity. A core test revolves around money, leadership, sexual prowess, and other areas most men pride themselves on strength in.

This is Part I of a 2-parter on core tests. Part I deals with core tests in pickups and on dates.

Women will use core tests on you at any stage of interaction with them. They will use them with you during the courtship. They’ll use them on dates. They’ll core test you in the bedroom as you escalate to sex. They’ll core test you early on into a sexual relationship, half a year into your relationship, or ten years into marriage. Core tests are the most dangerous tests women will use on you – yet they also present the greatest opportunity to set massively powerful frames.

We’ll talk about how to spot a core test, why core tests carry so much force to shake most men so easily, and how to shrug core tests off in a way that will not only make women’s respect for you shoot through the ceiling, but will help you yourself cement your own identity as an unshakeable man.

Core tests serve as a reliable way to show women around you a kind of dynamic confidence most men don’t know how to summon up. And in this way, they can be quite useful to encounter.

Make Yourself the Sexual Prize by Showing Her Your Sexual Standards

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

sexual standards
A mighty new way to position yourself as a sexual prize a girl simply must have: communicate exciting sexual standards to her that also turn her on.

Welcome back, gentlemen!

Today I will share a cool verbal technique that will help make a girl perceive you as a more attractive lover (through sexual prizing). It also gets her to comply to sexual behavior that you find preferable.

Yeah, that sounds pretty juicy, but this strategy is not too hard to pull off. It can be used by intermediate and advanced players. Beginners can give it a shot, too, but I believe it is key to have your fundamentals in check before attempting this. I also believe a minimum amount of sexual experience is important when it comes down to using this technique.

This technique is based on the concept of having standards (and how to use them to attract women). Women find men with standards to be of higher value. In other words, a man with standards is perceived to be more attractive. Women find it attractive when a man knows what he wants and how to get it. A girl will also feel more desired and attractive when she feels like she is being “accepted” by a guy with standards.

Note that I used the word “accepted,” which assumes she is the one chasing him and he is the one accepting her, which is by itself a good frame. Additionally, through the use of standards, you can challenge her, disqualify her, and force her to qualify. All of this sets the frame of you being the prize, which amps up her attraction.

Now, if you haven’t read yourself up on the importance of standards, their roles in seduction, their benefits and limitations, and how they can be used to “qualify her” and “disqualify her” (i.e., forcing her to qualify to you), then I suggest you check out the following posts, as they constitute crucial fundamentals in seduction (and posts covering fundamentals are must reads).

And for those more advanced players out there who enjoy using sexual game (including sex talk and other methods based on sexual prizing), check out this post that discusses how to use your standards to make her qualify sexually.

This post will discuss similar concepts, and the idea will be to use your standards to make her qualify to you sexually.

Franco Lombardi | Learning Pickup Takes Discipline, Part 1 (Podcast)

Varoon Rajah's picture

Welcome back to another episode of Dating Mechanics, everyone!

I’m pleased to announce the return of Franco Lombardi, our fearless moderator of the Girls Chase boards, for an interview on how discipline affects your success in dating. This is one of the most important concepts that anyone should make an effort to learn and understand regardless of skill level.

The Beginner's Quick Start Guide to Picking Up Girls and Dating

Denton Fisher's picture

picking up girls
This guide lays out the major stages and steps to focus on for anyone new to picking up girls and dating women. Use it to get up and running fast.

Most of the boot camps I’ve held in my career as a dating coach have been with guys who were fairly weathered in their journey to success with women. But last week I found myself coaching a fresh-to-the-game kind of guy. Going out with me was among the first times he had ever gone out to approach women. But I was so used to dealing with guys who had at least some inkling of what success with women meant that I found myself utterly at a loss for words when it came to coaching someone this new.

That experience inspired me to write this article, in which I seek to not only give better advice to my student, but to provide something for anyone who is looking to make seduction a part of their lives. It’s something to help you avoid some of the pitfalls that made people like myself stumble back when we were new to learned success with women.