Emotions

There are many common errors men make in dating. These errors sabotage in small ways or large ways with women. The errors put guys through endless frustrations... usually of their own doing.

We'll talk about an error today in the way guys often think about "next time." Because it's sort of a big one, but it's likely one you won't stop to reconsider too often.

If you sift back through your memories, I bet you will find instances where you thought "I'll do it next time." See a beautiful girl? "I'll talk to her next time." Talk to beautiful girl? "I'll ask her out next time." On a date with beautiful girl? "I'll ask her home next time." Home alone with beautiful girl? "I'll make a move on her next time." As soon as you read these, I know you know the thoughts are counterproductive. If you're like most men, you still have them sometimes anyway though, don't you?

What's not included are the 'next time' thoughts you don't have. Like "That girl rejected me, but I'll get it next time." Or "My approach sucked. Next time will be better." Or "It's all gone tits-up with this girlfriend. But I'll do things right with my next one."

Men have these 'positive next time' thoughts far less often than they should. Yet they are a key to staying sane in the moment, and heading off neediness before it crops up.

To avoid triggering Female State Control in the women you seek to bang, it helps to focus on particular concepts, such as social frame, investment, and comfort.

Welcome back. I promised to share my latest insights on female state control (FSC). We've been discussing this new concept over the last few weeks, so here are the previous articles if you haven't had a chance to read them:

1. Female State Control (FSC): Theoretical Causes and Effects
2. Female State Control (FSC): Preemptive Measures

Quick recap: FSC is a defense mechanism that auto-regulates a woman’s state whenever she feels that her emotions are getting out of control. A woman may be stimulated by a guy too much, too fast. Despite enjoying the strong emotions this man elicits, it can become too much for her, causing her to slow things down or outright eject.

Here are three reasons a woman needs to regulate her state:

1. To protect herself: she wants time to assess and know that a guy is safe to hook up with. She needs to regulate her state so she can make a sober judgment of him.

2. To feel in control of the situation and not feel helpless: knowing that she is in control creates comfort

3. To maintain her social/sexual power: by putting out too much, a woman gives away social power, which she could otherwise use to create social bonds and acquire providers

A woman controls her state in these ways:

• Putting herself away from you: she will leave to go dance, go to the bathroom, and so on
• Turn cold (out of the blue)
• Have her friends drag her state down (cockblock you or cockblock her)
• De-escalate the interaction

FSC can be misinterpreted as anti-slut defense (ASD), which shares similar symptoms.

In my previous post, we discussed solutions on how to avoid FSC by:

• Slowing things down
• Focus on frames rather than buyer’s temperature

Today we will go further by looking at what we can do to bypass it.

Guys get told they’re guilty of horrible double standards all the time. But are double standards actually a bad thing… and are they even real?

There is a strange phenomenon in urban places. Double standards come under attack.

Not all double standards, mind you. But certain ones.

It’s simple to get somewhere with a girl when you use the floors and ceilings method. Raise her floor, and raise her ceiling, and she will soon be yours.

I just talked to Alek about his neat new series on Female State Control. If you haven't read it yet, check it out (see the link).

When we talked about that, it brought up a way of thinking about how to get somewhere with a girl I've long had, but not discussed much. I've talked about it here and there, especially with deep diving and connection stuff. It's a sort of basic understanding of how progress with women works.

This understanding is what we might call 'The Floors and Ceilings Method'.

This method is very slightly complicated to understand. But not much. And once you have it, it gives you another dimension to understand male-female courtships with.

The method isn't limited to seduction. It also works with sales. It works with new friendship formation. Any kind of new relationship formation, especially where you want to get someone to do something, uses it. We'll focus on using it with women you like in this article, but it applies everywhere.

This is a simple method. I'll explain how it works, and you'll soon see how it applies to so many things.

Before you can put new beliefs in, first you must push past old bad beliefs that conflict. But what if you don’t even know you have them?

There are two sides to learning.

On the one hand, there's learning something new. This side is important. You need to learn new strategies to get what you want. You need new techniques. You must give yourself new mindsets, new behaviors, and new mental models. All this is vital.

There's another side though that's a lot more overlooked. This side is in many ways even more important than the first side (learning), because without it, the first side is tough or impossible. This second side is that of unlearning. It is the art of deprogramming.

Everyone knows when a cult member makes it out of a cult, he has to go through a long period of deprogramming. This is worst for children raised within that cult, where the cult is all they've ever known. People raised in a religion who reject that religion go through it. People raised outside religion who later embrace it go through it too. The unlearning -- the deprogramming -- is as crucial as and in many ways more crucial than the learning. Until a man deprograms himself of old beliefs, he doesn't have the room to take on much in the way of new ones.

Deprogramming lies at the heart of switching from an ineffective way of trying to get what you want to an effective way.

Yet, sometimes, some men are wholly resistant to deprogramming.

And when you can't deprogram a man, you can't reprogram him either.

Which is bad for all sorts of reasons, if his old program is not a good, useful, helpful one for him.

In our continuing study of Female State Control, we consider methods to avoid it entirely, including better calibration and focusing more on frame control than arousal.

Hey, guys. Welcome back.

In my previous post, I discussed a new and different form of resistance that we labeled Female State Control (FSC). This form of resistance is very common, different from the other more well-known resistance type called anti-slut defense or ASD. The difference is that ASD deals with her defense mechanism against slut-shaming and other negative social consequences related to female promiscuity.

FSC is a biological mechanism that helps women make rational choices about sex partners. Women tend to get easily carried away in their emotions, and that is usually beneficial to their purpose of nurturing and also grants them a higher emotional intelligence (EQ) than men. Strong emotions can help her make good decisions (emotions hindering rational decision-making is not always true; often, it is quite the opposite). However, when emotions seem to be too strong (too much of the good stuff), there is a potential risk of her getting carried away, hence increasing the chance of making an irrational choice.

We must understand that women are instinctively more risk-averse than men, partly because of the higher risks they may experience during pregnancy. Therefore, it is imperative that women are more selective than men when it comes to choosing a mate.

So, whenever a woman is getting carried away, she has an underlying conscious voice that forces her to pull herself out of situations where she can get carried away, by:

• Resisting
• De-escalating the vibe
• Going to the bathroom
• Having her friend cockblock her
• And so on

These actions allow her to gain control of her emotions and make a rational choice. This is FSC.

Women have a built-in defense mechanism against losing control and screwing the wrong guy. Let’s investigate the groundbreaking theory of Female State Control (FSC).

Hey, everyone. I hope you are all doing great. Last week we discussed a key subject in pickup and seduction, namely anti-slut defense (ASD). We define ASD as the female defense mechanism against social consequences caused by perceived promiscuous behavior. In other words, a defense mechanism that protects women against the potential slut label.

ASD helps us understand some of the causes behind female resistance toward sexual advances (in addition to feeling uncomfortable with the person or situation or simply not being that attracted to a guy; the latter is more of a rejection than a form of resistance). This is why women sometimes resist your advances despite being clearly into you.

Today we’ll discuss another form of resistance. In the future, I will cover this in detail. This form is called female state control (FSC). It has been known, at least on an intuitive level by some top seducers, but it has neither been addressed publicly nor written about in much detail. It shocks me a bit that this phenomenon is never discussed, because it is a key factor with encounters and seduction. It isn’t some weird subject that only happens to top-end seducers in rare circumstances. Beginners will also face this issue, actually more often than the pros.

As mentioned, few will discuss what I mention in this article. I know of only one guy who has put words to FSC, and his article was about a different subject. And because this subject is not discussed often, little is known. I will be honest; this is the topic I talk about the most in my seducer circles, and we still have not figured it all out. I am therefore giving you the latest, cutting-edge theory. Some elements of FSC are closely related to other well-known theories from sociology, psychology, and biology.

Here at Girls Chase we normally stick to topics we know inside out. This will be an exception because it is still a theory in development. Therefore, I will only give you the basic elements here, and expound upon it later posts when we know more and have clarity. Certainly more data needs to be collected, but we're on it!