Confidence | Girls Chase

Confidence

How confidence affects results with women, and how to get your confidence, boldness, and "inner game" tightened up and running smoothly.

Optimize Your Nervous System (and Gain State Control)

optimize nervous system
How good are you at using what’s in your brain? Fight-or-flight responses in social situations are common – yet you’re not bound to them.

Most pick-up theory is not well informed about the workings of the brain and the nervous system, which causes many guys to severely underperform in terms of their social state control. The author has studied this topic from both theoretical and practical angles for years and would like to share his experience on this issue.

In pick-up theory, state is used as a description of both the mental state and the resulting physical state of a person. Field reports often mention how the “state” of those involved changes during an evening or day out. “State” can more or less be used synonymously with “mood.”

State is an extremely important factor in one’s ability to perform seduction, in that the results of a given action will be heavily dependent on the mood of the person performing it – for obvious reasons. Your mood can be said to be the sum of your earlier interactions, and if your mood is bad, it means that the world has treated you badly – hardly a turn-on. Conversely, a stable, good mood will tell a history of being treated well by the world. And those who are constantly able to stay in a stable, good mood, no matter how bad the situation is, will be looked up to.

In evolutionary terms, your mood is a fitness indicator similar to looking physically healthy. Controlling your mood is therefore of utmost importance in nearly any social setting – and this is what “state control” refers to.

Are You Spinning Yourself? (Almost Certainly)

spinning yourself
Spin is used to influence how others think about things. But are you using spin on your own thoughts? Odds are, you are – and it risks sabotaging you.

Some of my greatest teachers in seduction were my coworkers in car sales. In a world in which they were highly distrusted, they were still able to finagle hundreds of thousands of dollars from unassuming customers.

I personally do not condone some of the tactics I was taught, and I probably would not teach most of them for morality’s sake. But a few ideas and concepts were definitely worth teaching, and there is one in particular I would like to share with you today.

That particular technique is the technique called “spinning”; or, “taking off the market.”

How to Become a Centered Warrior

centered warrior
Being centered offers one of the biggest leaps forward with dating, self, and life. There’s no easy way to it – it comes from enduring pain and trial.

The protagonist walks toward the camera, face emotionless, calm. Then suddenly an explosion erupts behind him. Does he flinch away from it. Does surprise touch his face. No. He stays calm as the world is blown to bits – and he’s seemingly untouched from it all as he nonchalantly walks toward the camera.

You have probably seen countless versions of this scene in quite a few movies, and it has probably sent goose bumps creeping up your arms as a side effect. What is it about this scene that puts us in such a state of awe?

Why is something like this so inspiring – and duplicated so many times over? Many of us would like to not just see this as a protagonist on the screen, but a hopeful reflection of ourselves. We want to be the guy who cannot be affected by the world no matter how chaotic it is. We want what we see on the television to be the reflection we see in the mirror. We want to be grounded just like that figure so often portrayed.

The concept of being grounded has always been the hardest for me to explain, let alone teach. It is one of those things I cannot show on a boot camp or fix over the course of days or even weeks. It is something you have to choose to do in your heart. Because, as cheesy as it sounds, only once you decide you are going to do what it takes to deepen this part of you, only then can you achieve it.

Firstly, what is being grounded – what makes a centered warrior? Think of waves crashing on rocks. Are the rocks strong and resolute, or are they weak and brittle? Do they stand for ages, or do they quickly become dislodged or shattered like obsidian? Or maybe it is a tree in a storm, standing tall and unbroken, maybe bending under the torrent of wind or outright being broken in half. The idea is that no matter what is thrown at you, you are always at ease, completely in control of your emotions.

When you talk to a stranger, this is one of the first things they may notice about your character, either consciously or subconsciously – not by what you do, but by what you don’t do. It is as simple as displaying a warm tone despite receiving anything but. A steady gaze. Lack of fidgeting. Being grounded is being unaffected when the surroundings get testy. When a guy is drunkenly belligerent and tries to push your buttons, do you let him? When a girl calls you ugly, do you care?

Boobs vs. Butts: Male Tastes Differ (& Your 10 Isn’t Everybody’s)

boobs vs. butts
You shouldn’t treat her like a ‘10’… Because even the most beautiful girl is only a ‘10’ to a certain chunk of the male population.

I came across a fascinating 1968 study on male preferences in female body part sizes this weekend. The study asked men to rate various female silhouettes, like these:

Then, at a separate date, in what the male subjects thought was a separate study, the researchers had the same men answer a number of questions about themselves.

They then compared the men’s body type preferences to personality attributes and other dimensions to look for correlations. And they discovered (as you might imagine) that different types of men like different types of women.

The body type ratings men gave were of figures that looked like this:

boobs vs. butts

And the personality dimensions and background details the men provided information on covered the gamut, from social interaction styles to what kind of magazines they read.

We’ll talk about the findings of this study and a few other ones, if you’re curious to know what your taste in women says about you. But more than that, the point of this post is going to be to give you one additional tool to help take the girls you really like off any pedestals you have them on... By driving home the point that while you might think she’s a complete 10/10, there are plenty of other men who don’t, and odds are she doesn’t even view herself that way.

3 Common Roadblocks to Seduction Mastery

roadblocks to seduction
As you seek to master the art of seduction, you’ll discover 3 key roadblocks: the first 1000 approaches, wrong practice, and too much faking.

Plateaus are the bane of any skill we seek mastery in, and they are most prominent in learned success with women. These obstructions in the pick-up community are not just speed bumps but full-on roadblocks preventing people from reaching the heights they dream of.

This article is aimed at any guy who wants to get seriously good at meeting girls via cold approach. What are the hurdles? What must you overcome to get there?

In my experience, there are three (3) major roadblocks. I call them:

  1. 1000 approaches,
  2. Deliberate practice, and
  3. Not faking but being.

How can you recognize and defeat each one as efficiently as possible?

Tactics Tuesdays: “That’s Fake” and Practice Mentality

practice mentality
When you start to change your appearance or behavior, people can call you fake. Or you might even feel fake. Yet with Practice Mentality, you can avoid all this.

In my August article on seven major dating mistakes, a reader asks about people who view (or attack) self-improvement efforts or general behavior as ‘being fake’ or ‘not being real’:

This is regarding barriers to improving fundamentals and improving your life in general:

Did you notice how people label any potential improvement as fake? If they improve, they think, people won’t like them for who they are and that’s bad. For people who have had advantages for a long time it seems like a natural part of them.

For example:

– Someone who is fat thinks that if he loses weight and women start liking him more, then they don’t like him for who he really is. They are just a bunch of superficial cunts. But, if you’ve been thin for a long time, it seems like a part of you.

– If you dress poorly, improving your fashion will seem as fake. Who cares how you dress? People should like you for who you are. But, those who dress well will tell you it’s just a part of them – part of who they are.

– Being famous or wealthy and getting great results with women also seems fake to many people (99.999% of people don’t have access to fame or great wealth). So, you’ll hear terms like ‘fame-digger’ or ‘gold-digger’ used to describe those superficial women who like rock stars, football players or bankers/CEOs.

– The same goes for learning ‘game’. If you’re learning it, then you’re just a fake manipulator.

etc.

What do you think about this phenomenon? Is it even real or am I delusional?

Well, first off, this is absolutely a genuine phenomenon, and it’s something every man who sits down to improve himself in one dimension or another encounters.

You start to change something about yourself, and somebody calls you fake. Or you see others change their reactions toward you as you change superficial details about yourself, and you decide they are fake. Or maybe you even look at your outward displays, deem them nothing like whom you are on the inside, and label yourself a fake.

I’m going to talk briefly about why people view people engaged in self-improvement as fake, and then I’m going to give you a useful mindset I’ve long used to not have to worry about this.

I call it the ‘Practice Mentality’. But we’ll get to that.

Tactics Tuesdays: Destroy Your Own Learned Helplessness

learned helplessness
Our society trains men to be helpless, for several of its own reasons. But it’s important you know helplessness is learned... not inborn.

Learned helplessness is the behavior shift that occurs when an animal or individual decides its situation is impossible to change. At this point, the individual decides he is helpless to affect the outcome, and simply gives up trying.

Some of the most tragic stories of crushed spirits come when you discuss learned helplessness. Animals who’ve been caged so long they won’t try to leave even if you leave their cage doors open. Prisoners who aren’t able to operate outside the penal system, so commit crimes to go back to the familiar comfort of the prison yard. And men who’ve been unsuccessful with women so long they don’t even try to meet them.

In a recent popular thread on our Beginners’ Forum, a forum member starts off by asking why women like dominant men and men who take the lead. But it quickly becomes clear his real issue is not a philosophical question of why women prefer dominant men, but an exploration of his desire for women, yet lack of motivation to take steps to meet, date, and sleep with them.

This article will not be about why girls desire dominance and leadership, per se. If you’d like more on those topics, see these articles:

Rather, this article will be about the phenomenon of learned helplessness in the modern male – where it comes from, who’s responsible for it, and what you can do to shake it off.

How to Use Donald Trump-Style Persuasion

Donald Trump persuasion
Donald Trump used masterful persuasion in his dark horse candidacy for U.S. President. Six (6) powerful persuasion tactics underpin his success.

A reader asks:

it’s been a year now since donald trump has been succesfully running his campaign.

Love him or hate him, the guy is a master persuader, really alpha, entertaining and never boring. He’s also extremely concise and repetitive in the way he speaks.

Exactly what robert greene would define as charismatic in his art of seduction

The funny thing though is I’ve noticed that he does a lot of things that you advocate not too do. ( explicit qualifying is the bread and butter of his persuasive effectiveness and constant repetition is another one. Plus, he’s got this essential quality of being brutal and effective when being under attack – an approach that is probably going to revolutionize politics world forever. )

Love him or not, what’s obvious is that he CAN persuade

Can u deconstruct his main strenghts and maybe reccomend some sources to how one can master verbal attack and , mainly, DEFENSE, like he does? I guess you could call that frame control.

Donald Trump is a persuasion phenomenon the likes of which the U.S. presidential election has not seen before. There are Donald Trump parallels in other civilizations and other eras; for instance, quite possibly ancient Rome’s Cato the Elder. But we haven’t seen a Donald Trump in the American presidential elections before.

In this article, I’m going to break down some of Donald Trump’s most oft-used persuasion techniques. I’ll point out what they are to you, show you how to use them, and give you plenty of examples.

If you’re reading this and you’re already bristling for political bias, I should note that I won’t be voting in this election (because I’m outside the U.S. with a Nevada citizenship, a Pennsylvania address, and a California driver license; I have no way to receive a mail-in ballot). I do not agree with all of any of the candidates’ policies, although I am a white male small business owner high in what psychologists call Traditional Masculinity Ideology, so that will necessarily bias me toward candidates offering some solutions over others. This article will be about tactics and strategies, not politics, but we’re all men and all men are inherently biased, so take that as you may. If any of my own bias leaks through, my apologies in advance; I am a (flawed) human, like you.

Disclaimers aside, let’s peel back the skin on Donald Trump-style persuasion... and see what we’ve got underneath.

The Top 3 Reasons to Pick Up Girls Sober

pick up girls sober
Check the nightlife, and you’ll see almost every guy out to pick up girls is drunk or high. If you can do it sober, you give yourself a major competitive advantage.

Do you blaze, drink, or do lines when you go out and hit the club to chat up girls?

One year ago, William Gupta talked about the truth about taking drugs and hooking up.

After a decade in the Game, I've noticed something striking - almost nobody is sober. When guys learn and practice pick-up, they tend to be drunk, stoned, or both... and a lot of the guys gaming in clubs are, to put it bluntly, doing coke in the bathrooms in order to keep themselves "up" for the long haul of partying and hitting on women until 2 in the morning.

Before you think I'm just being some prude who can't have a good time, let me preface what I'm about to say by mentioning that I struggled with various forms of addiction for a full decade. I've been through the depths of that hell, I know what the demons look and sound like in your head, and I know precisely what kind of blade a man needs to sever them in half and regain his life from the abyss.

Now, before I get into my top 3 reasons to practice pick-up sober, I'll briefly explain why I think so many guys can't seem to perform this art without a little "chemical help" of some type. I believe that the primary reason so many guys do pick-up stoned or drunk... which REALLY became clear once I cleaned up my act and started living the sober life... is that pick-up is scary as hell.