Calls & Texts  Responding to "im not sure yet"

apples

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
May 29, 2013
Messages
14
So this girl i met a bar and was hitting it off great with the other night texted me "I'll be at aubrey's tonight you happen to be going :)" I responded with "I'm probably going to stay in tonight. We should hang this week though". I really didn't want to have a convo with her but she kept the convo going and then we exchanged a few cocky & funny texts(not really sexy) which she responded well too. When i wanted to stop talking to her and make plans, i just said "What are you're plans Thursday?" which she just said "I'm not sure yet." which seems kind of short to me for a girl that seemed interested. I did already respond because i'm not too worried about this girl at the moment but for future reference, what would you guys say to that?

That just caught me off guard because all her previous text were all flirty then that was just a short 'who knows' like text.

Maybe i'm reading too much into it but i'm not sure.

Thoughts?
 

NarrowJ

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Feb 13, 2013
Messages
1,279
"I'm not sure yet" is the equivalent of "I don't have anything planned"

Set up the meet :)
 

Aero

Rookie
Rookie
Joined
Jul 4, 2013
Messages
3
NarrowJ said:
"I'm not sure yet" is the equivalent of "I don't have anything planned"

How did you come to this conclusion? I would like an in-depth explanation.
 

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Nov 20, 2012
Messages
6,553
kjonesa said:
When i wanted to stop talking to her and make plans, i just said "What are you're plans Thursday?" which she just said "I'm not sure yet." which seems kind of short to me for a girl that seemed interested. I did already respond because i'm not too worried about this girl at the moment but for future reference, what would you guys say to that?

Just be direct here. You would not want to drag on anymore. Tell her you want to meet her. She might be running on autopilot and it can end up relationship route or worse still, platonic.

Zac
 

Geebs

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Apr 15, 2013
Messages
25
Personally I would have answered "Awesome! That means you're joining me for XYZ". As I would have interpreted a message like that as woman speak for "I don't know I'm waiting to see if you come up with something interesting enough/make up my mind for me".
 

Franco

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Nov 14, 2012
Messages
3,641
Location
Southern California
kjonesa,

Your issue here is that you did not state your plans in the same text message in which you asked her if she was free. You are seemingly trying to trap her by asking her, "What are your plans on Thursday?" She has no idea what you have in mind, so she doesn't want to accept something if she doesn't know what it is.

You need to rephrase your text message to something like the following:

"Hey Jenelle, we should grab coffee or a drink this week if you're free :). What's your schedule like?"

It's extremely important you be completely clear and direct in what it is you want to do with her. Imagine if some guy you barely know were to hit you up and say, "hey man, what are you doing on Friday?" You know he's asking you because he probably wants to do something with you, but since he doesn't tell you what it is, you don't want to say, "nothing! I'm completely free!" Then he invites you to do something you absolutely hate doing, and you're put in the awkward situation of trying to get out of it or going along with it. Women feel the same way when you aren't clear about what it is you want to do with them.

This girl seems interested though. Be clear with your next invite, and I think she'll accept.

(Aero, the above should answer your question)

- Franco
 
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