Do you have to throw away a successful career to fuck lots of hot women?

Indian Race Troll (IRT)

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I've been thinking a lot about this as I am having a massive crisis right now.

I currently work in the financial industry and for a guy my age (mid 20s), the money is pretty good but the hours can at times be punishing (and I am not even in Investment Banking). Now I am on a path where I could potentially set myself up for life but I have been thinking of getting a party job on the side on my full time job, ideally working at a nightclub or a bar that attracts a lot of hot pussy.

But the fact that I have to do this makes me really question something.

Most of the guys I know in these sorts of professions whether it is doctor, lawyer, or white collar jobs that get laid are either in an LTR or wifing up hot party girls past their prime, they are not fucking these women in their prime and they are not casually fucking them either. There is always money involved.

It has me wondering whether leaving the corporate world or just about any high paying white collar role is a necessity if a guy wants to be the kind of guy that fucks a ton of hot girls and I mean fucks them, not having to deal with an LTR or being tied down to them in anyway whatsoever.

When you hear of a guy who lives this life he is usually a musician, model, famous, or works in the service industry.

It is rare to hear of an accountant, banker, software engineer, or doctor who is living that kind of a life at all.

Any thoughts and experiences on this?
 

andersen09

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Oh Pry said:
I've been thinking a lot about this as I am having a massive crisis right now.

I currently work in the financial industry and for a guy my age (mid 20s), the money is pretty good but the hours can at times be punishing (and I am not even in Investment Banking). Now I am on a path where I could potentially set myself up for life but I have been thinking of getting a party job on the side on my full time job, ideally working at a nightclub or a bar that attracts a lot of hot pussy.

But the fact that I have to do this makes me really question something.

Most of the guys I know in these sorts of professions whether it is doctor, lawyer, or white collar jobs that get laid are either in an LTR or wifing up hot party girls past their prime, they are not fucking these women in their prime and they are not casually fucking them either. There is always money involved.

It has me wondering whether leaving the corporate world or just about any high paying white collar role is a necessity if a guy wants to be the kind of guy that fucks a ton of hot girls and I mean fucks them, not having to deal with an LTR or being tied down to them in anyway whatsoever.

When you hear of a guy who lives this life he is usually a musician, model, famous, or works in the service industry.

It is rare to hear of an accountant, banker, software engineer, or doctor who is living that kind of a life at all.

Any thoughts and experiences on this?

The guys you know who are "fucking girls past their prime" is due to their presentation. It's not necessarily the profession itself, such as Musician, model, etc. It's about the perception of girls have about the profession and they categorize you as a provider type of guy.

Guy: "I'm a doctor"
Girls: "OHH I can tie this guy down"

Guy: "I'm a musician"
Girls: Hmm.. he must be X.. I wanna fuck him.

It's kind of like racial stereotypes.

Guy: I'm X
Girls: He must be... X, Y, Z.

#2. It's the language, experience, and your perception of the world.

A. How does doctors, lawyers, math professors, or engineers have in common?

They speak in facts, nouns, third person perspectives, and corporate world language. I.E "I work 9-5" jobs.

B. How does musicians, actors, painters, photographers talk?

Descriptions, colors, emotions, feelings, and adjectives.

An example.

Girl: How was your day? Hey! What's up?

Doctor: Oh just saw this new patient today, he has X/Y/Z. You?

Musician: I'm just writing a song.. feeling a little vibrant today. Wanna help me with lyrics?



So the problem isn't that you have a certain profession. It's more of that your profession builds you into a character that's either sexy/adventurous or professional and it's expressed through the way you communicate with her. Your thoughts/feelings/verbals

It's like reading a book on "how to do X" vs "Shades of grey"

One is full of facts and logic AKA doctors.
One is full of words that helps her feel emotions and imagine.

Hence, actors/musicians/actors > professionals.

I'd suggest exposing yourself to the creative world. Listen to lyrics of a song and listen to how musicians express themselves.
Take an acting class and learn how an actor learns about his character he will be acting out (it's amazing the depths they go to)
Try describing a photography without using a single noun (It has a car/It's blue/It's X vs Feels gloomy/Aesthetically Pleasing/Metaphors/Similes)

And take the language of the creatives, and apply to it when you talk about your professional world.

Think about how a comedian describes an event vs a regular guy buy they're talking bout the same effect.
It has different effect on the people.
It's the same with your situation.

Hope this helps a bit and points you in the right direction
 

Sandman

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I am in a top tier law firm with insane hours but I didn't excel at my job because all of my concentration was on sex & pick up and now they are letting me go.

I don't think these jobs prevent you from learning, applying pick up, just the hours.

I don't regret my choice to choose seduction over career for the past year because it's a must skill and now I'm having sex with *pretty* girls semi-constantly at least :)
 

Franco

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OP,

From what I've seen, the only thing that matters is hours. If you're working a profession that is regularly making you work more than 8 hours a day, you're going to have a terrible time trying to create any social life outside of that.

I have several friends in investment banking and financial professions such as large real estate acquisition (including one friend at Goldman Sachs), and they've basically told me that it's practically a competition every day to see who leaves the building last. So, my friend regularly spends 12-14 hours sitting at his desk -- sometimes getting work done, sometimes not.

This is just stupid, in my opinion. They get absolutely enormous bonuses at the end of the year, but no amount of money makes up for the amount of time you lose each year sitting in front of a desk while losing valuable free time.

As a software engineer myself, I don't make quite as much money as they do, but I'm rarely working more than 8 hours a day (other than to meet deadlines, which aren't extremely common if you're working on larger projects).

So if you really want to pursue a hedonistic lifestyle, you're going to have to either pursue a career that actually allows you to have time to do that, or you're going to have to become an entrepreneur and start your own business so that you can define your own hours. However, from what I understand, becoming an entrepreneur is a lot of grueling work, at least for the first few years, but then you get to reap the rewards after you're established and no longer need to commit 50-60 hours a week to it.

I guess my point here is: if you're not an entrepreneur and you're working more than 8 hours a day (or more than 40-45 hours a week), you should probably look for a better job/career.

- Franco
 

Seppuku

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Oh Pry said:
It is rare to hear of an accountant, banker, software engineer, or doctor who is living that kind of a life at all.
I'm a career guy in the Finance industry and have enjoyed a very exciting life these last three years. And I'm not talking about paying girls for sex.

It's normal to have to put on a lot of work to get started in your career, whatever the career, whether or not in Finance. You should put up the required work at the beginning - it's part of the learning curve, and will position you for a better life later on, one way or another.

Now if you're in Finance industry, you should try to switch to the Investment Management area (like I did) - the so-called Buy Side. It is still earning big bucks and bonuses, but the working hours are much, much less.

Regarding entrepreneurship, like Franco suggests, there's a trade-of. You do it earlier. Or you do it later. More years of corporate career will give you a stronger CV, a stronger network, and probably along the way, more business ideas that you couldn't possibly have had with less experience. So... If you think you have a very solid business idea, go for it! But otherwise, you may be better off by sticking a little longer in a company.

And to answer your question, no, you shouldn't throw away a good career just to fuck women. This is putting women on a pedestal again. Yourself first. Women second. You first and foremost work on increasing your value - and a good career will do it nicely. It's the beauty of being a man. As long as you work on yourself (including your career), your value can only increase... and so does your attractiveness to the opposite sex.

Seppuku
PS. Oh yes. And the US is good for working, but not so good for work/life balance, at least in the high careers, as far as I can see from abroad. In other countries you will find a culture more accommodating to personal free time. For this, I love the Gulf countries!
 

Fuck This

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Oh Pry said:
.

It is rare to hear of an accountant, banker, software engineer, or doctor who is living that kind of a life at all.

Any thoughts and experiences on this?

Because he is doing it, and not whining on online forums. He makes the most of the time he has and earns the money to do it right.


Discretion is key and time optimization and imparting the scarcity to women is a key part of this...

The travelling salesman with a girl in every port
"Hey I'm only in town for 12 hours, let's make the most of it."

The sales rep
"Hey I need to entertain these out of town clients. Can you and six of your hot friends come party with us at the nightclub? I'll be expensing all our drinks."

The Late shift worker:
"Hey I'm getting done here at 11, meet you at the club and crash at your place?"

The Hero Doctor
"Man just delivered twins from a woman in a car crash . All three lived, let's celebrate!" or "Man I had the worst day at work with a multiple victim accident, I could use a quiet night at home to wind down with you"
 

Drck

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Agree that it comes down to hours, how much time you have or willing to spent either at work or on women.

Most guys who've been around know the obvious:

Money is a huge issue, if you make good money you are just a walking target. If woman is pretty and smart, and many are, she will obviously go after such guy and consider him great potential provider. Some are gold diggers, but not necessary all, some are great wives especially if they came from good background. You'll have great wife but will pay lots of money for living a high lifestyle, that is how it works in society... I met great wives who stuck to their husband no matter what, even if he makes average salary...

For women it is not the actual money that you have, most could care less how much you make and have on your account - it is rather the status and lifestyle you can offer her... If she has a choice to live from paycheck to paycheck in small bedroom with guy who's all friends are bums, versus guy who can afford great house in higher society and secure finances, guess who's she's going to chose... Again, talking about smart women, not dumbasses...

So it depends on what you want, if you just want flings/NSA I would setup strong frame right from the beginning. A woman usually brings up the topic of LTR. Being honest is simple yet quite effective method: "I'm not looking for anything serious at this time, maybe sort of NSA, but I am open minded and can change my mind in the future, depending on how the relationship goes"

Which is actually quite a damn good frame, you just have to stick to it. She knows you are looking for NSA with the potential of being more serious later on, so if she wants you she has to work quite hard to get you and keep you... at the same time, you hold both cards, you can chose whether you want NSA or LTR later on, without shifting your frame... So if you are smart, you can also have both of the worlds...

If she is looking for LTR only she'll most likely walk away, and she'll tell you clearly why... Which of course sucks but hey, such is life, you can't win all the time, at least she'll appreciate you for honesty... In reality, many women are open minded, all you have to do is to stick to your frame (e.g. don't cave to LTR no matter what she does), and if you are attractive enough she'll consider changing her mind anyway...
 

Indian Race Troll (IRT)

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Franco said:
OP,

From what I've seen, the only thing that matters is hours. If you're working a profession that is regularly making you work more than 8 hours a day, you're going to have a terrible time trying to create any social life outside of that.

I have several friends in investment banking and financial professions such as large real estate acquisition (including one friend at Goldman Sachs), and they've basically told me that it's practically a competition every day to see who leaves the building last. So, my friend regularly spends 12-14 hours sitting at his desk -- sometimes getting work done, sometimes not.

This is just stupid, in my opinion. They get absolutely enormous bonuses at the end of the year, but no amount of money makes up for the amount of time you lose each year sitting in front of a desk while losing valuable free time.

- Franco

It is no wonder so many of these guys walk away from it all and the burnout rates in Investment Banking are so high.

We do put guys in a tough predicament though.

If you want to be filthy rich, you have to avoid investing too much time into anything but being filthy rich. On the other hand if you want to be successful with women, you either have to put yourself in a lifestyle that allows you to do that or you have to sacrifice so much like a great career.

I went against going into IB which gives me some time to use night game, day game, dating apps, and occasional social events where I know some of the people but so much of that is stuffed up for the weekends.
 

Franco

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OP,

If you want to be filthy rich, you have to avoid investing too much time into anything but being filthy rich. On the other hand if you want to be successful with women, you either have to put yourself in a lifestyle that allows you to do that or you have to sacrifice so much like a great career.

This is exactly why I don't want to be filthy rich. ;)

I think you want to be making at least $75k-80k (in the US) a year. This is a ballpark number of course, and some guys may need more or less to be happy, but I find this is a good starting target for most guys. You can probably find a way to make that amount without completely overworking yourself.

After you're making six figures though, I'd say there's definitely a point where the time investment it takes to make more than that amount may not be worth the loss in happiness/freedom. This is assuming you're a corporate worker though -- if you've started your own business, make six figures, and mostly automated your process and/or handed it off to people working below you, then you're set. :)

- Franco
 

Indian Race Troll (IRT)

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Franco said:
OP,

If you want to be filthy rich, you have to avoid investing too much time into anything but being filthy rich. On the other hand if you want to be successful with women, you either have to put yourself in a lifestyle that allows you to do that or you have to sacrifice so much like a great career.

This is exactly why I don't want to be filthy rich. ;)

I think you want to be making at least $75k-80k (in the US) a year. This is a ballpark number of course, and some guys may need more or less to be happy, but I find this is a good starting target for most guys. You can probably find a way to make that amount without completely overworking yourself.

After you're making six figures though, I'd say there's definitely a point where the time investment it takes to make more than that amount may not be worth the loss in happiness/freedom. This is assuming you're a corporate worker though -- if you've started your own business, make six figures, and mostly automated your process and/or handed it off to people working below you, then you're set. :)

- Franco

Unless you're living in NYC, almost impossible to get an apartment in Manhattan if you make under 120k.
 

uForia

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Franco said:
OP,

From what I've seen, the only thing that matters is hours. If you're working a profession that is regularly making you work more than 8 hours a day, you're going to have a terrible time trying to create any social life outside of that.

I have several friends in investment banking and financial professions such as large real estate acquisition (including one friend at Goldman Sachs), and they've basically told me that it's practically a competition every day to see who leaves the building last. So, my friend regularly spends 12-14 hours sitting at his desk -- sometimes getting work done, sometimes not.

This is just stupid, in my opinion. They get absolutely enormous bonuses at the end of the year, but no amount of money makes up for the amount of time you lose each year sitting in front of a desk while losing valuable free time.

As a software engineer myself, I don't make quite as much money as they do, but I'm rarely working more than 8 hours a day (other than to meet deadlines, which aren't extremely common if you're working on larger projects).

So if you really want to pursue a hedonistic lifestyle, you're going to have to either pursue a career that actually allows you to have time to do that, or you're going to have to become an entrepreneur and start your own business so that you can define your own hours. However, from what I understand, becoming an entrepreneur is a lot of grueling work, at least for the first few years, but then you get to reap the rewards after you're established and no longer need to commit 50-60 hours a week to it.

I guess my point here is: if you're not an entrepreneur and you're working more than 8 hours a day (or more than 40-45 hours a week), you should probably look for a better job/career.

- Franco
Another thing I didn't know about you, you're a software engineer like me but much happier. I find there's somewhat of a tradeoff in our careers in terms of having success in our career vs women since obviously tech hubs have a lot more men than women. I live in Seattle, which there's definitely gonna be more career growth here but the gender ratio is very poor. Tbh though, I actually find a lot more detriment in my lack of culture fit in this city when it comes to the people I meet rather than the ratio itself necessarily. If you're that alternative, hip, and creative leftist type, you're going to do super well here and overcome the bad ratio no doubt. But when I went back to New York to meet some of my friends, I felt a greater bond with the financial industry folks, this guy interned as a strat in Goldman and our mindsets fit together like a puzzle. We enjoyed the movies Wall Street, Boiler Room, American Psycho, Margin Call, and Wolf of Wall Street and would casually joke about snorting cocaine and all that. Never mind that we were software folks too, but culturally we all fit together better in that context rather than what I'm surrounded by here in Seattle, which in tech is currently a lot of H1B visa Indian workers who mostly keep to themselves culturally and socially as well as some Chinese workers on TN or w/e with the same deal. I constantly reach out with them to gain political capital and eat lunch together and even play games with them after work but I can't ever imagine hanging out with this crowd other than a work context. I often find myself staring at my monitor, out the window to this beautiful view of Lake Union with the Queen Anne hill to the left and I-5 to the right and asking myself why the hell did I sign up for this? Money. Then I went to meetups outside of work and I meet a bunch of people who don't fit in my puzzle and it definitely manifests in the women not being my 'type' either and therefore unattractive to me. After hearing Jeff Bezo's comment on his regret minimization framework, it's like I would definitely not regret saving less money in New York than living how I do right now in perpetuity so I will be searching jobs in the financial industry in New York after my first promotion. It may oftentimes be a matter of cultural fit too on your success with women I'd say.

For Oh Pry though, I think it's really all in your head. I interned at a bank like Goldman last summer and I definitely cold approached some cute brunettes and they were receptive until I fucked up the cold approach. Yeah if you spend a lot of time at the office, I can easily imagine you getting too exhausted to meet people and having the mixer events and stuff not line up with your schedule too well thus decreasing your chances. That goes for any career though, not just finance. I imagine finance guys in two spectrums, the beta bucks type as you mentioned lumped in with the doctors but also the alpha playboy type that is more socially calibrated than stereotypical douchebags and leverages his wealth correctly to bed women (I feel like that's you). What happens outside the office is up to you, how you guard your time outside of office without giving up promotions and raises is up to you ("<Boss>, I have an appt today but I'll be sure to get those pitchbooks to you by 10 AM sharp tomorrow"). I currently find that when faced with a decision like this on career vs. women in my case, I have to make sure that I'm actually getting the two birds in the bush instead of losing the one bird I have in my hand and losing it all. NYC seems to fit the bill for me, but you seem to have it all already? 36 lays under your belt and a decent amount of money? I don't see how the hell it's 'ncessary' for you to give up your career for women when I find that you have both already.
 

Knight Who Say NI

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andersen09 said something really good. I'm actually in the film industry, and the difference in lifestyle to my "conventional" friends is night and day. Being an artsy guy is certainly polarizing - girls either dig it a lot, or think that I'm a bum -, bur it generally gives some really interesting experiences.

Oh Pry, I recommend that you read and do Julia Cameron's The Artist Way to exercise your creative, artistic side, and, if time allows, to search and frequent unusual weeklong cultural festivals. A example: in Brazil, every january, happens a huge film festival that extends for nine days, in a small, historical tourist town. All the cute girls from the nearest towns - and from all over the country and even the world - flock there - and are easy pray to a charming, artistic man. ;)

I'm pretty sure that there are a lot of hidden gems like these in the US as well!
 

Franco

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uForia,

Another thing I didn't know about you, you're a software engineer like me but much happier. I find there's somewhat of a tradeoff in our careers in terms of having success in our career vs women since obviously tech hubs have a lot more men than women. I live in Seattle, which there's definitely gonna be more career growth here but the gender ratio is very poor. Tbh though, I actually find a lot more detriment in my lack of culture fit in this city when it comes to the people I meet rather than the ratio itself necessarily. If you're that alternative, hip, and creative leftist type, you're going to do super well here and overcome the bad ratio no doubt. But when I went back to New York to meet some of my friends, I felt a greater bond with the financial industry folks, this guy interned as a strat in Goldman and our mindsets fit together like a puzzle. We enjoyed the movies Wall Street, Boiler Room, American Psycho, Margin Call, and Wolf of Wall Street and would casually joke about snorting cocaine and all that. Never mind that we were software folks too, but culturally we all fit together better in that context rather than what I'm surrounded by here in Seattle, which in tech is currently a lot of H1B visa Indian workers who mostly keep to themselves culturally and socially as well as some Chinese workers on TN or w/e with the same deal. I constantly reach out with them to gain political capital and eat lunch together and even play games with them after work but I can't ever imagine hanging out with this crowd other than a work context. I often find myself staring at my monitor, out the window to this beautiful view of Lake Union with the Queen Anne hill to the left and I-5 to the right and asking myself why the hell did I sign up for this? Money. Then I went to meetups outside of work and I meet a bunch of people who don't fit in my puzzle and it definitely manifests in the women not being my 'type' either and therefore unattractive to me. After hearing Jeff Bezo's comment on his regret minimization framework, it's like I would definitely not regret saving less money in New York than living how I do right now in perpetuity so I will be searching jobs in the financial industry in New York after my first promotion. It may oftentimes be a matter of cultural fit too on your success with women I'd say.

Yeah, one thing I should mention is that my "friends" that I hang out with are not my co-workers -- while I have things I enjoy talking about with my fellow software engineers (such as code, new tech, mobile apps, gaming, etc.), almost everything I do that revolves around me meeting women comes from friends that I've met outside of my work atmosphere.

My "party" friends (for lack of a better term, I guess?) were met by going out to events I enjoy (specifically around electronic music, DJs, festivals, etc., in my case) and then agreeing to swap numbers and hang out more often. These guys also were hanging out with the type of women I wanted to date, so it was a win-win to befriend some cool guys that enjoy the same scene(s) that I do and also enjoy the same type of women that I do.

Your work buddies don't have to be your "event" buddies. Keep in mind your work is for you: do what you personally enjoy and what makes you the amount of money you want to be making. I separate my work and my play. Even the people I talk to are entirely separate, and we talk about entirely separate things (I talk about tech with software engineer co-workers and I talk about women and music with my party buddies). I do happen to have one close friend who works at my company who also enjoys the same type of social events that I do, so naturally I'm very close with him because we can talk about both work and play at any time!

Keep in mind that who you work with does not have to dictate who your friends are outside of work. You can make friends at work and you can make entirely different friends at other social events that interest you. ;)

- Franco
 

SillyCarl

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Oh Pry

In my opinion you have to go the entrepreneur route to fuck tons of women, I run a shopify store online with 5 other business partners and work less than 5hrs a day most days. I am in college currently because my parents are African who believe in college like they do God so I have to go and finish, but one business partner I work with recently moved to Los Angeles for the sole purpose of more pussy (he says for a better social life) from North Carolina. I do not know how old you are or how deep you are invested into your investment job position but perhaps you could run your own online business or any other business you can think of as a side hustle first then when you reach a level of income your are satisfied with you can pursue that full heartedly.

But in my honest opinion entrepreneurship is the way to go, and with the burst of ecommerce I think there is more opportunity than ever right now, you don't even have to do it the ethical way :). You can teach people how to do x without having done x yourself and make a killing, just see how many youtube gurus there are on youtube who make hour long videos supposedly telling you how to get rich but then direct you to a course *cough cough guys like Tai Lopez. The thing with entrepreneurship is getting started, I knew nothing about marketing, SEO, business in general before I started but you learn that as you progress and even if your business fails, given that you attempted the business correctly and not half assed it, you would have gathered some job applicable skills such as SEO that companies, especially start-ups are willing to pay lots of money for.

SillyCarl
 

Sub-Zero

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SillyCarl said:
Oh Pry

In my opinion you have to go the entrepreneur route to fuck tons of women, I run a shopify store online with 5 other business partners and work less than 5hrs a day most days. I am in college currently because my parents are African who believe in college like they do God so I have to go and finish, but one business partner I work with recently moved to Los Angeles for the sole purpose of more pussy (he says for a better social life) from North Carolina. I do not know how old you are or how deep you are invested into your investment job position but perhaps you could run your own online business or any other business you can think of as a side hustle first then when you reach a level of income your are satisfied with you can pursue that full heartedly.

But in my honest opinion entrepreneurship is the way to go, and with the burst of ecommerce I think there is more opportunity than ever right now, you don't even have to do it the ethical way :). You can teach people how to do x without having done x yourself and make a killing, just see how many youtube gurus there are on youtube who make hour long videos supposedly telling you how to get rich but then direct you to a course *cough cough guys like Tai Lopez. The thing with entrepreneurship is getting started, I knew nothing about marketing, SEO, business in general before I started but you learn that as you progress and even if your business fails, given that you attempted the business correctly and not half assed it, you would have gathered some job applicable skills such as SEO that companies, especially start-ups are willing to pay lots of money for.

SillyCarl


Bro, how do I get started doing all of this? I'm trying to start an online business, but I have no experience with anything at all. What's your story? Where did you start out and learn information? I don't have any business partners and would rather sell by myself anyway, but I want to do this. Let me know what I have to look up, what I have to do? What do I have to sell? I can't work anymore low wage shitty jobs, and I'm Losing my mind on what I can do to make some money I can actually so something more than pay bills with. I really wanna get started in this bad.
 
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