A girl called me mature

MakeHerHappy

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Oct 10, 2014
Messages
29
Okay, I went out with my guy friend last time and he meet this girl, I talk less as much while my friend makes his own moves and a bit of kino, I used the law of least effort with low energy while talking, putting the pressure on her a bit. Then the night end and the next day my guy friend talked to me about that girl and I asked him how it was...then it went to this conversation where I asked him what was the girls impression of me...he told me that the girl said that I was too mature, and I talked less.

My question is, is talking less makes you seem liked a matured person? Is it good or bad? I mean on my side cos I don't really care about what that girl thinks of me in this moment but I'm concerned more of this impression if this were to be changed if its bad or keep it if it was good.
 

Chase

Chieftan
Staff member
tribal-elder
Joined
Oct 9, 2012
Messages
5,550
Happy-

Yes, talking less will make you seem more composed, mature, dominant, and mysterious. This can be good or bad, depending on the girl - it mainly boils down to attainability.

If she thinks she's hot stuff, and is confident, you'll tend to do quite well being more reserved and using more nonverbal communication. If she's not as confident / less secure, however, you'll need to spend more time talking and reassuring her to keep your attainability up and help her be comfortable around you.

It sounds like in this case the girl felt you were too far on the one side, so you might've played up the mysterious role a bit too much for her tastes. That'll vary from girl to girl, of course, so you'll need to calibrate.

Chase
 

MakeHerHappy

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Oct 10, 2014
Messages
29
@Chase

The first time I saw her and my impression was she's the insecure type of girl, her hair was covering her right eye, and I gotta tell that she's not the attractive/good looking girl and on my scale of 1-10 she is in the 4. She also talked less, and I did throw a couple of jokes in the start but she didn't responded well, I did mentioned that I was with my guy friend and I wasn't talking more its because I'm also on the phone with someone, while my guy friend (who seems to be attracted to her) does the talking, asking all this boring questions (like a normal guy) and the girl always throws back this silly answers.

Today me and my friend went out and we run into her in the mall and she is with her girlfriend and here is how the conversation looked like:

Guy Friend: Hey, how's it going? I didn't know you were here...what are you doing here? (friendly way)
Her: Well, you were also here so why shouldn't I?
Guy Friend: Oh, who is that with you?
Her: She's my friend Janice.
Guy Friend: Hi Janice! How's it goin?
Janice: I'm great, you?
Guy Friend: I'm fine too.
Guy Friend: So what you two doing here really?
Her: You were here too, so am I.
Guy Friend: (puts his hands in the girl's shoulder)
Her: (she resisted, breaks the kino and shrugs the my friend's hands)
Her: Well, we are going somewhere...just go with your friend (me)
Guy friend: Okay then.

Note: The whole interactions lasted for about 4 minutes or less, I didn't speak to this whole encounter, I was there walking dialing someone on the phone and until the moment we left.

Then we went into our separate ways, the two of them went in the other side of the mall while me and my friend go on the other side and my friend was disappointed of her attitude, then later the girl keeps texting him:

Her: So you didn't let me know that you were here.
Guy Friend: I did told you last time.
Her: Just go with your friend then, I'm shy with him.

As you can see, there are bit of drama here. First she was sarcastic (which I thought she was being funny) the moment my friend asked her in a very friendly way, second is that she did that again which I don't find it amusing, then on the text she's showing this jealousy towards me, and then being shy.
 
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