How not to scare girls during day game?

Lithuanian

Space Monkey
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May 1, 2015
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I finally started my day game properly. I had picked up girls during day game before, but they were just one-offs. This time I approached 4 girls. It wasn't very successful, but I don't mind and I'm just glad I had a good time.

On first two I used indirect direct - asking were is obvious object (street) and than saying, that I'm joking and that I thought the girl was cute. First one didn't even stop when I asked directions (maybe I should've stood directly in front of her). Second ones were walking and I joined them to ask were is certain street (we were walking in it). They told me and I said I knew and I thought one of those (two) girls were cute. At first she got confused and didn't know what to say, then started walking faster and told me they were in a hurry and that they were tourists (I chuckle remembering this).

Third and fourth girls were sitting in the city center on the benches. Third didn't talk too much, didn't really engage in conversation, so I left to not waste my time. Fourth was more open, but when I asked her number, she said she better give her Facebook, because there all kinds of creeps that call at night or smth like that. But after talking for a few minutes more I asked again and she gave me her number.

So, the question is, how to make girls more comfortable, so as not to scare them? I should note, that girls in my country (east Europe) are very shy and conservative.

I also have one more question. With that fourth girl, I used some tip from Chase, which was very useful and worked wonders. I asked this girl, is it okey to give compliments to a stranger on saturday evening. She said probably not, because, it would be strange. I said, that I wanted to ask her to give me a compliment. Then both of them (with her girl friend) they started to really think compliments for me. And each gave me a compliment (that I'm very brave and very eloquent). I laugh when I write this, it was so cute from them. Do you know some other tips like this one, which would challenge girls? Because they are very useful and I'd like to know more of them.
 

Bboy100

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I'm not too experienced with Day Game myself. So I won't give you any advice when it comes to specific things you said. Having said that, if girls are being weirded out or think you're creepy, check your fundamentals and your vibe. Is your voice inflection super high (like you're trying to force rapport)? Are you leaning in waay too much, are you otherwise giving off needy non-verbals. Also, how's your internal state? Are you feeling panicked? Are you feeling calm? All these things contribute to your vibe. If anything is off, its likely that they'll feel startled/other negative emotions. Even if the actual words/"game" you used were gold.

Also, imo, Eastern European women are a lot more open to chat with strangers than American women. Definitely would not consider them shy by any stretch of the imagination.
 

Raqimus

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Also some girls just may not be into you.
 

Smith

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I don't know how Eastern European women are like, but I have experienced the same thing when girls get scared when you stop them, and here's what I found that helped me a lot.
1. voice and eye contact. Try to stay present to the moment. Be congruent. I think these are more important than anything else.

2. Calibrate. If she looks scared or suspicious, take the pressure off. I would put my hands up and smile.
Me:"oh sorry haha how are you?"
Her: "good"
Me: "good =) just wanna say you have like the most adorable look. "
Her: "oh thanks!haha"
Me: "yea you look like ....."
If at that point, they're smiling now but still walking away, then they're probably not interested. I would just drop it. "anyway have a good day"
You don't have to copy exactly what I do, but the point is be congruent and calibrated. If you feel nervous, you can say it to release the pressure, because chances are she's very nervous too. I have girls that look relieved and said "haha me too" when I told them I'm actually quite nervous.

3. social momentum. The first few interactions don't always go well so fk it up as much as you want and have fun.
 

Skid

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Obviously the first thing you need to watch is your body language , fundamentals , voice tone and make sure you smile depending on how you want to open either a sexual smile or warm one. Don't show your teeth that communicates too much excitement on your part.

As far as actually opening goes its usually advisable to get in front of her upon opening if she is moving , the better your fundamentals the more laid back and lazy you can be on this rule its arguably better if you approach from the side and she turns and stops to face you. What I like to do if she is moving is walking beside her for a couple of seconds to see if she notices me (preopen) THEN pretend to notice her as you speed up and walk past and get in front open as you do this , generally direct is best if she is moving because its the best way to shock her system out of auto pilot with a low pressure compliment. Just make sure you watch your voice tone and you speak slowish AND MAKE EYE CONTACT. Eye contact is by far the most important , you can totally screw up and speak really quiet and she asks you to repeat yourself (bad habit I have) but the girl will stop just because of your eye contact and smile. Don't forget to stop moving as well - I always feel as though its weak to walk with a girl as you open her. If she is walking towards you definitely just step in front of her path stop and open. If she is actually in a rush you can suggest you walk if you think you can get somewhere with her after opening. Also don't be afraid to re open if you feel as though she didn't hear you or you didn't open strong enough/finish opening. Give her ten seconds and then try again.

Really practice makes perfect the more you open the less and less you'll notice girls give you the creep look - but even 2 years in occasionally I fuck up and get given the creep look lols. I find 90% of the time when you get it you probably had a scary/awkward look on your face when you opened- so like smith said be present in the moment. Even if you do fuck up you can usually rescue it with something like didn't mean to scare you , was just saying hey you're cute.

If she is sitting , you can go direct or semi direct but once you get really good at delivering compliments there is very little difference between how girls with react to your direct open whether she is moving or standstill. Because when she is sitting and you're calibrated you can tell usually when she isn't interested and not be as intense in your chat then eject as the fear is that with girls that are sitting your'e going to freak them out and they can't "escape" from the situation if you come across as the sort of guy that isn't going to plow while she is sitting and not make it a big deal when she isn't interested then you've got nothing to fear :). I always try to keep it as smooth as possible and even if she clearly isn't interested , I want to leave her thinking wow , that was a really smooth and polite yet sexy approach -I hope this happens some more.

It also usually takes me 1-3 sets depending on how I'm feeling before I start to open properly even after doing it this long. Although I do find that approaching girls you find genuinely really attractive works wonders as well - when you start you just want to practice but later when you see a girl you are really attracted too even if its my first set , I usually open really well , so there is that as well.

Skid
 

Sophisticated Gent

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Lithuanian and Bboy100,

Bboy100 said:
Also, imo, Eastern European women are a lot more open to chat with strangers than American women. Definitely would not consider them shy by any stretch of the imagination.


From what I have read there is a considerable difference in the attitudes of Eastern European women based on the country they are from. Hungarian women are open and friendly where East German women are guarded and conservative. You might want to read some of the articles from Global Seducer to get his take on the women in your part of the world. https://www.globalseducer.com/category/global-hunting/
 

ray_zorse

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Great site. I went there to check his take on Japanese women, haven't found it yet but read a good article on dating Asian women that really resonated with me. However I would caution that it's hard to really generalize about culture. The extent to which you specialize in a certain niche will determine your success there. I HIGHLY recommend to learn their language (German or Hungarian in your examples) as how you use it makes a HUGE difference to their subjective impressions of you. You don't have to get it perfect, but sexually teasing an Osakan woman in Osaka dialect while usung strong masculine language "Ore" for "I" and so on, is a fast ticket to the bedroom as it bypasses a lot of her mental barriers and reservations about foreign guys -- he's fun, he's "one of us", he is genuinely interested in "us" not just a racial or cultural stereotype, he is low effort to hang out with, he is dominant and leading. If you speak the Tokyo (standard) dialect in Osaka or the Bonn (former standard) dialect in former East Berlin, or you routinely call women "Madam" when you meet them (something that is often taught to foreigners and an easy mistake to make since you might not realize how your speech really translates to equivalent English), you'll have more work to do because you're building attraction consciously rather than subconsciously. You can stick to English if she has good English, which equates to investment on her part, but sooner or later this might look a bit non-dominant especially to girls who are accustomed to learning other languages from a young age. Also spend lots of time there obviously. And of course try to specialize in multiple niches.
Ray
 
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