Articles by Hector Castillo | Girls Chase

Articles by Hector Castillo

How to Kickstart Behavior Change in Girlfriends or Lovers

girlfriend behavior modification
So you want to modify a girlfriend’s behavior. Yet if you come out and say, “I want you to change,” you’ll offend. You must employ subtler means.

I was talking with my best friend the other day. He’s married but still occasionally reads Girls Chase. Plus, we talk all the time, so he’s bound to hear about girls and then talk about them.

One of his particular interests in relationship management right now is using social media to change the behavior of one’s girlfriend or wife.

We’ve discussed operant conditioning with relationships before. Encourage and reward what behavior you like; ignore the behavior you don’t.

But what we haven’t discussed too much is how to get the ball rolling with operant conditioning – how do you show her what you want her to do?

After a long talk on the phone with my buddy, we came up with a good system for guys in relationships to follow.

The God and the Goddess: A Theosophy of the Sexes

theosophy of sexes
Theosophy is the study of divine wisdom. And what can be more divine than the coupling of male with female?

Theology is the study of God or gods. The primary question in Theology is the nature of God.

Theosophy, on the other hand, is the study of divine wisdom and actions with the intent to reveal deep truths about ourselves, our divine nature, and our behavior. This is an article born of my fascination with the subject; it explores how our masculine divinity works in contrast and in cahoots with feminine divinity. I hope you enjoy the read, and I hope that perhaps these conceits might ring true and light a few bulbs in your mind that haven’t occurred to you before.

Sometimes all it takes is a good story to illustrate something poetically that is difficult to tackle logically. I will be speaking poetically a lot and will occasionally put my metaphors into the context of this website in order to keep it practical with respect to women, dating, sex, and relationships.

If you happen upon a few paradoxes as we go, that’s a good sign. That’s how these things work.

Why Silent Men are Sexy Men

power of silence
Your silence speaks volumes. But you don’t just need to use it to be serious; you can use it to increase sexual tension, for better communication, for humor, and more.

It’s where everything started and it is where everything will return to.

Silence is the sweetest sound in the universe. It is the language of God in purest form.

And you aren’t using it properly.

In the past, we’ve covered how to avoid saying something stupid by talking less. We’ve also covered how to use the pregnant pause. I also intend to write some pieces on concision and replacing words with non-verbals whenever possible; but for now, I simply want to talk about how and when to be quiet, and why it is so powerful.

What is Her Type? Deconstruct Her, and Find Out

what's her type?
If you want to know what her type is (so you may more easily date her), you’ll have to ask her a few questions, first.

“What’s her type?”

I have mixed views on the question.

In one way, you need to figure out her fantasy and then become that. You need to adapt to specific women. If she’s a fit snow bunny, it would behoove you to have spent some time at the gym (which is probably where you’d meet her anyways); also, maybe have a few tattoos, be a bit over-the-top with your masculinity, and a bit aloof.

At the same time, you can’t be every girl’s type. Even if you want to be the Übermensch of seduction, you can’t be everything at once.

But I think I’ve come up with a solution. There are three parts to this.

  1. Figure out her type

  2. Understand the difference between tokens and types

  3. Decide how far you want to go

Girls Adore Homoerotic Men

homoerotic
Homoerotic humor is a turn-on for women. How far must you take it (and must you be gay yourself) to reap its benefits?

As I recently caught up with a friend over the phone, he told me about a recent break-up with a girl. Apparently, he “accidentally” got into a relationship with her. This girl was quite hot and probably the prize in many a man’s eye. The entire time he told me about how it happened and how it ended, neither of us could stop laughing.

Why?

Because he’s gay.

Like, very, very gay. Nipple-piercings level gay.

You wouldn’t think it when you first met him. He’s a very dominant, tall, and muscular black guy who would give almost any natural or pickup artist I know a good run for his money. His social skills come from a variety of backgrounds. He was a college athlete who grew up and went to school in a very conservative, Southern town in the United States. Being black, he endured some racial tensions that minorities can pretty exclusively call their troubles. He’s had guns pulled on him by cops for no reason and gotten into quite a few fights over the color of his skin.

Experiences like that will toughen you. Moreover, he had to hide the fact that he was gay and play it straight for most of his life. Being black was tough enough where he’s from; if he’d come out of the closet, he would have found himself in a ridiculously difficult situation. So he put up the act, but being removed from genuine pleasure, his adversity was doubled.

Ironically, his emotional distance from his identity made him quite desirable to women. He didn’t want to bang the girls he’d hit on and approached, and he’d often rebuff the advances of women. Not knowing he was gay, these women would wonder why he didn’t want them.

So, they’d chase. They’d chase hard.

Girls waiting for him naked in his room, girls begging for him to impregnate them, groups of girls trying to gangbang him, etc.

He was truly unattainable, even with girlfriends that he eventually took to keep up his act. And even those girls would be left wondering why he didn’t want to have sex with them.

For the women, his standards seemed so high, they couldn’t even see the ceiling. This intrigued them.

So his skills with women grew, even though he didn’t want them to. He learned how to make friends, seduce women, be the center of attention, all while he played in quite a decent athletic league (he was invited by a professional team of his sport to try out for a spot).

Dominant, competitive, socially attuned, friendly, fun…

But still gay.

He eventually did jump out of the closet and move to the city I met him in. We became the closest of friends and would often go out together, either in the straight parts of town or at the homo-hangouts.

And women were always drawn to him, especially when he told them he was gay.

Now, you may be wondering how he got this girlfriend?

He met her through one of his party social circles. She would always flirt with him, but being gay, he never took any of it too seriously. They’d party together and even sleep in the same bed together. Over time, he got the sense that maybe she wanted some of his chocolate. But, he wasn’t too attracted… cuz, well, he likes dick.

Then one night, he got super drunk while out with her. When they returned to his apartment, they jumped into the bed together. While lying there and feeling a bit roused up but without any guys to fulfill himself with, he casually asked her if she wanted to fool around. She excitedly said yes. She then gave him the best head of his life (even better than any other guy, too, allegedly; he told me how ridiculous that is, because guys know what feels good, and therefore give epic blowjobs), and he, surprisingly, got hard. So, he smashed.

Strangely enough, he liked it. They kept smashing. Multiple times a day, multiple times a week.

He told her that this was only a fun, casual thing, because, uh, he’s gay.

She agreed. All in good fun.

Of course, we know how that went, don’t we? He lays the good dick, isn’t emotionally needy in any way, and is having fun? The perfect concoction for cock addiction.

She got hella addicted. She would incessantly text him. They’d hangout all the time. Shag all the time. While out together, she would hold his hand and hang over him like a girlfriend. And once, when he inadvertently – and totally unintentionally – made her feel unloved, she tried to make him jealous by grinding on some other guy (which he found funny because he was more jealous of her grinding on the guy, not the guy for dry humping her).

That’s when he finally realized how far he’d accidentally fallen into a relationship.

He eventually had to cut her off when she pushed for a relationship (and even had to swat off her attempts at reconciliation; e.g., “We can go back to just fucking, that’s fine!”).

Like I said, hilarious. I mean, I feel for the girl, but still funny as hell.

He went back to dudes and realized that he was still definitely gay.

But after hearing this story, I knew I had to finally write this article. Too good of a story.

What I’ll cover here is why women find gay men attractive and how you can apply these traits and homoeroticism in general to your interactions with women… and men. (There was a somewhat relevant article posted way back in the day by a guest poster, Sarah Williams, that everyone hated for no reason at all. It was accurate and insightful. I call bitterness. Hopefully this goes better.)

Note: no, I’m not saying you should consider shagging dudes or becoming bisexual in any way. I’m just going to explain what’s attractive about being flirty with other men (or intimate, if you choose to explore). And yes, while the increased acceptance and quantity of homosexuality in a society has been correlated with looser morals and, eventually, the fall of civilizations, it has been a part of successful and powerful human histories as well. From heroes like King David and Hercules to conquerors like Alexander the Great, male-to-male intimacy has been shown not to diminish one man’s ambition or prowess. Even baller guys like James Dean were suspected of being bisexual. In many societies, homoeroticism (not necessarily speaking of male-to-male penetration) was largely accepted (e.g., Athens, Sparta, etc.) It didn’t stop them from kicking ass on a spectacular scale. That said, I don’t exactly expect the Manosphere-boys to pour through this one without a cringe or two.

So let me clarify: I am not promoting homosexuality (though neither am I condemning it), but I am lauding the seductive power of homoeroticism.

Let’s get to it, shall we?

Seduction Spotlight: Ted Mosby

ted mosby
Ted Mosby represents a different kind of seducer. He uses expert level dating skills to appear “nice” – and slip right below girls’ radars.

For my second stab at Seduction Spotlight (read my first one to get a feel for how this works), I decided to get a bit more romantic (but definitely not any less pimpin’) and cover one of my favorite characters, from one of my all-time favorite shows: Ted Mosby of How I Met You Mother.

In this article, we’ll cover Ted’s ultra-unique pickup style, how he runs his dates, how he manages relationships, and even his taste in women.

If I make any references to some episodes and scenes that don’t have any linkable videos, go on Netflix and look for the episodes referenced there (I assume you have an account, considering how often you try and Netflix & Chill dem hoes).

Buddhism, the False Face, and the Paradox of Frame

paradox of frame
How does Buddhism relate to dating? While you refine your persona, you must put on a “false face”… Yet as you do you deceive yourself, as much as others.

I was talking to a coaching client of mine the other day. He expressed to me how badly he wanted to be a “seduction machine” and that he was willing to do anything to reach that level.

I smiled. His enthusiasm and drive was uplifting. Also, he was willing to pay good money for probably one of the most important skills a man can have in his life: the ability to connect with women emotionally, romantically, and sexually; that is a sign of drive if anything is.

However, progress is not so simple. Or, to put it another way, it is far simpler than you can imagine.

In his imagination, he had this grand idea of “the master seducer” – a version of himself that is everything he’s ever wanted it to be: to have a voice that sizzles women’s ears and makes their pussies tremble, to walk and move with the grace and power of a seasoned warrior, to have eyes that undress women literally and emotionally, and to have a voice that commands them as though Zeus himself demanded their obedience.

Unfortunately, this self is a mirage. Fortunately, it is also closer to you than your skin and your bones.

This is not a contradiction. Contradictions are when one thing needs to be right, and you say both are. This, instead, is a paradox: both statements are correct yet seem contradictory.

And it’s been my experience that if you are following a path of inquiry and have not yet reached a paradox, you haven’t gone far enough.

How to Date a Party Girl (If You So Dare)

how to date a party girl
Party girls are fun, but can be real handfuls. Want to date one anyway? Here’s everything you need to pull it off… As well as can be expected.

While I was visiting my hometown after a long tour through Europe, I decided to hit up an ex-girlfriend. Since our sex was always great, we stayed friends after multiple breakups... and she was bisexual, so I decided that we should set up a threesome together. We’d done it before and it was hella fun, so why not again?

We spent the next week matching with girls on Tinder and contacting anyone we knew. We had a few YESs, but they fell through for some reason or another. It was around the holidays, so most girls who were down were going to be out of town and wouldn’t get back until after I’d already gotten out of Dodge. I personally had a lot of “I like you but I don’t want to share you” messages. Those were nice.

Eventually, the night came and we decided to go out and find our prey together.

Awesome, right?

We meet up, shag a few times, drink a bit, then head out to the bars. We talk to a few girls and both make out with some (and almost pull), but half way through our second pull attempt, she starts getting super aggressive with the girl. If it was a guy doing it, he’d be considered creepy, but she’s a hot girl, so it’s more funny than anything.

After this scene, I watch her stumble up to random girls and get totally blown out. She comes back to me, defeated.

“That girl totally ignored you, chica.”

“Yeah, she’s a bitch.”

“Haha, oh really? Well guess what – welcome to my world. This is how guys get laid.”

“Yeah, it fucking sucks.”

5 Secrets from The Alabaster Girl

alabaster girl
Zan Perrion’s book The Alabaster Girl contains masterful philosophy on women. Here are 5 of its most stand-out points.

There is a beast in this world who walks around in the form of a man.

He doesn’t advertise himself too much, but he has been a constant yet subtle presence ever since the seduction community came out of the basement. This subtlety and grace speaks even more to his level of mastery.

He has been dedicated not to fame, glory, or riches (all of which he deserves), but to his passion: to be the greatest lover of women the world has ever seen.

His name... is Zan Perrion.

And if you navigate the treasure room that is his book, The Alabaster Girl, you will quickly discover that he is in contention for the title he seeks.

When you first encounter the flow of Zan’s prose in The Alabaster Girl, you may think you’ve stumbled upon an 18th century poet’s lost writings.

This is a mistake, and one he addresses in his videos about the book (and if you have trouble understanding his sometimes-cryptic language, especially if you’re still inexperienced, these videos will help clarify his thoughts):

Zan is anything but a hopeless romantic. If you’re experienced with women, you will see how the dark truths of male and female sexuality tinge the edges of each page and fill his flowery prose with rustic realism. He will say something so nonchalantly that if you simply gloss over it, you’ll miss how darkly beautiful it is, and how true.

Or, if you’re familiar with his old mASF forum postings, you will know personally how much of a scoundrel he is (a charge he accepts in the opening pages of his book). Eighty-nine lays in one year, cuckolding Johnny Depp in a nightclub, dating and living with two girls who are best friends... he is no saint, and that’s why he knows women and truly loves them. He embraces both the darkness and the light of the world, both of the masculine and the feminine.

Once you get to the chapter on his early childhood, you will understand. You will know his grit, his darkness, and therefore the true breadth of his light, because of that darkness.

And you will know his deep, abiding love for women. Reading of his longing for women was like reading my own confessions of unconditional love toward women.

I could write an entire book on what I learned from his book, but we’re going limit this post to the first five secrets that resonated with me upon my now third reading.

7 Reasons Why Women Get Into Relationships (6 Bad, 1 Good)

why women get into relationships
Women have all kinds of reasons to get into a relationship. Here are the 6 worst reasons… And the 1 best one.

Both men and women are guilty of entering relationships for unhealthy reasons, but today I’m going to talk about some unhealthy reasons women get into relationships – and the only genuinely healthy reason why she should date you.

This article might rub some the wrong way, because you may find that your girlfriend or a girl you’re interested in fits one or more of these “unhealthy” categories.

Two things to say about this:

  1. Firstly, it’s not a death sentence if you date one of these girls. It can actually be very fun and educational. I have a habit of taking dominant, high-sex drive girlfriends (I’m currently dating one), and these women tend to fit into one or more of these categories. Why do I do it? Because it’s a challenge. I usually come out of these relationships tough as hell and with a new paradigm of game that sets me onto a reckless path of pussy destruction (however, I will note that I am becoming a bit unhappy with women like this; the return on the effort you have to put in is quite unbalanced, and I’m probably going to shift more toward conservative, low-partner count women).

  2. Secondly, you’re probably not going to listen to me. I talked to Chase about a girl I’m dating, and after I concluded I’m not ready to make the relationship serious, I suggested that maybe I should have one or two other girlfriends (not casual relationships, but developed relationships). His response went something like “That’s probably what’s best for you, but I’m not going to tell you who to date, because nobody ever listens; people date who they want to date.” I took this as a personal challenge and am going to actively try and find another girlfriend more suitable to my long-term desires, because I’m not interested in anything but the most elite in life. That being said, most won’t do the work it takes to push themselves beyond short-term emotions, and even I have to admit it’s a bit difficult when you do genuinely like and care about a girl (as I do this one).

So, if you find some truth in what I say in this article but choose not to act upon it, I don’t blame you. It’s hard. It’s where even the best pick-up artists in the world (and the most talented naturals) fail.

That being said, let’s get to it. I’ll go over the six (6) unhealthy reasons why women get into relationships, what kind of women usually follow these paths... and then I’ll tell you the most important reason she should get into a relationship with you.